Last night Kim and I went to the show Velvet at the Sydney Opera House.

It was a combination of circus, burlesque and boogie nights (70's music) in one show.




The show had great music with Marcia Hines and Brendan Maclean and the performers were great. I think everyones favourite was the guy with the hula hoops.

I don't know for sure which ones are Claus and which ones are Rene.

This post is mostly about Claus when he was at his top as one of Denmarks top tennis players.

I have kept scans of all the newspaper clippings from when he was winning a lot of tournaments.





























































In the mid 90's he started to get pretty sick and although he still tried to play tennis it was never at the same level again. Eventually he more or less gave up. His illness took to great a hold of him. These are some of the 'darkest' photos I have of him while he was struggling with his schizophrenia and were taken shortly before I moved to Australia.





He lost contact with most of his friends and was very dependent on my mum and dad as well as other support programs in place.







I prefer to remember him as he was before he passed away.


















This poem reminds me of him.

The morning after I killed myself, I woke up.

I made myself breakfast in bed. I added salt and pepper to my eggs and used my toast for a cheese and bacon sandwich. I squeezed a grapefruit into a juice glass. I scraped the ashes from the frying pan and rinsed the butter off the counter. I washed the dishes and folded the towels.
The morning after I killed myself, I fell in love. Not with the boy down the street or the middle school principal. Not with the everyday jogger or the grocer who always left the avocados out of the bag. I fell in love with my mother and the way she sat on the floor of my room holding each rock from my collection in her palms until they grew dark with sweat. I fell in love with my father down at the river as he placed my note into a bottle and sent it into the current. With my brother who once believed in unicorns but who now sat in his desk at school trying desperately to believe I still existed.

The morning after I killed myself, I walked the dog. I watched the way her tail twitched when a bird flew by or how her pace quickened at the sight of a cat. I saw the empty space in her eyes when she reached a stick and turned around to greet me so we could play catch but saw nothing but sky in my place. I stood by as strangers stroked her muzzle and she wilted beneath their touch like she did once for mine.

The morning after I killed myself, I went back to the neighbors’ yard where I left my footprints in concrete as a two year old and examined how they were already fading. I picked a few daylilies and pulled a few weeds and watched the elderly woman through her window as she read the paper with the news of my death. I saw her husband spit tobacco into the kitchen sink and bring her her daily medication.

The morning after I killed myself, I watched the sun come up. Each orange tree opened like a hand and the kid down the street pointed out a single red cloud to his mother.

The morning after I killed myself, I went back to that body in the morgue and tried to talk some sense into her. I told her about the avocados and the stepping stones, the river and her parents. I told her about the sunsets and the dog and the beach.

The morning after I killed myself, I tried to unkill myself, but couldn’t finish what I started.

—Meggie Royer

Here are some more photos from my childhood in no particular order.

The first ones from a New Years eve where we got a bit silly with the hats. These were taken at a New Years even in Kenya and before my brother got really sick, so probably around 1989/90.



And here is Claus.



And my mum.




I was really good at shooting when I was a kid and won lots of championships. This photo is one of the few things I have from that time.


This is Claus and I with our dog.



Not sure which ones of these is Claus and which is me.




















This was taken just christmas day in the back yard of my grandma's (Mormor) house. We got the skis as a christmas present. All the fields behind her house belonged to my mothers brother Flemming.



I think this may be my brother. For the first time I've noticed the photo in the background. It looks like this may be a photo of my mum with her two sisters and brother and what could be her dad Raimer in the middle.















This would most likely be the new years eve where we were trapped by the snow 1978/79. We were supposed to have celebrated with the family but couldn't even get out of the house. Delicious with a glass of milk and a pie.






We didn't have a lawn in the back yard. Instead we had pebbles...lots of fun shoveling them.







This I think is a christmas eve dinner at my grandmas (mormor) place. My mum on the left and my uncle Flemming in the middle. Not sure who the person standing up in. It could be my grandmas brother. Possibly from around 1976/77


I think it is my great grandpa (Raimer) in the middle row number two from the left. The title of the photo says that it is Christoffer (??) in the top left corner. Looking at the age of the boys this would have been taken in the 1920's.


Claus dancing aeound the christmas tree and my mum and grandma (Bedstemor/Farmor).


From left to Right. My grandma (On my dads side/Bedstemor/farmor), Knud Aage (My uncle/dads brother), My mum (in the foreground), My grandad (in the background), Irene (my auntie/dads sister), Grete and I assume the baby is Vinnie which means that it is likely that my mum was pregnant with Claus (born in July).






















This was taken at my grandparents place and after my brother got sick. He was really suffering at this point.






This is one of the happiest family photos I have and the only one I have a print of.



Going for a walk at Marielyst with Lott and Willy some of our german friends. Claus in the foreground and my dad on the right. I think you can just spot me in yellow pants in the background.



I think this is at Lotte and Willy's summer house.






Not sure if this is Claus or myself being babtised. It is my grand mother being god mother.











This was taken outside our summer house in Marielyst.



My brother number 2 from the top right on his school photo.



Claus at daycare number 4 from the top left.



Me at day care top left.

Here is some more old photos of my mum. This time with here brother and sisters.

This first one if probably one of the oldest. You can tell that the photo was shot in black and white and that the negative was later coloured (badly). It would be my mum in the middle with her two sisters Eli (the oldest on the right) and Yrsa.




This is my mum in the middle with what I assume is cousins.





I think it is my grandmother (Karen) holding my mum.


Here is the same as the first photo, but this time without the colour.



My mum and her sisters playing in the courtyard of their farm


My mum with her older sisters.


Eli, Yrsa, Sonja and Flemming Kragh.


Having her photo taken as a little girl.


Upset about having her photo taken?
























My mum with her younger brother Flemming.


As a liitle girl


My mum in school.





From left to right...Eli, Yrsa my mum (Sonja) and Flemming.


As a young girls/woman...possibly from her Konfirmation.



My mum as a girl scout (no 4 from the left).


It is Flemming in the middle and my mum on the right.

When I was a kid we would every summer travel to Southern Europe with our caravan.

Usually travelling through Swizerland or Austria ending up in Italy (Either Lido di Jesolo or the Italian Riviera). Underway we would visit old friends of my mum and dad from the time they were working in Italy.

Here are some photos from that time.









I just noticed the burn scar on my arm on the above photo. I think this is one of the few childhood photos where you can really see it.




















This was out caravan while travelling.








This is our caravan with the tent up in the middle.

This weekend we took the kids for a walk with some friends from Maroubra to Lurline Bay.

It is a nice little pleasant walk that is easy for the kids.




They loved jumping between the boulders.




...and exploring the small rock pools.







Because of the recent storms the beach was full of Blue bottles, so no playing in the sand this time around.





They are nasty little creatures that will sting you badly if you touch them.




This surfer was being very careful in his bare feet.

Earlier this month it was Lucas birthday.

We didn't have a kids party for him, but we did celebrate with the family.







We gave him a new bike for his birthday...he was stunned and didn't know what to think of it, but he loves riding it now.

Last weekend there was a Lego exhibition in the city.

We caught the train in to St James station and walked from there.





It was a fairly small exhibition with my favourite being the pirate ship with all the details of the lower decks.












There was also some Ninjago and Star wars.










And a lot of other pieces.

Rather than keeping all the kids artwork I instead take photos of it.

Here is some of the latest additions.

I think it is about time that I introduce myself. It has afterall been two weeks since I was born...but my parents didn't have a name ready for me when the Stork arrived....typical!!

They have now finally named me...took them long enough. They had a shortlist of names, but they weren't sure which one I would prefer. I was trying to tell them but there is an interpretation problem, they don't understand Baby and I am still unable to speak English. Fortunately they chose the name that I like as well. For the first couple of weeks they just called me 'Baby'.


So here I go....Hello everyone. My name is AIDEN LEE PALLESEN....and I am pleased to meet you!




The first two weeks of my life has been busy. I arrived to this world on the 7th June 2010. Suddenly I was removed from my mums comfortable belly and was expected to take my first breath. Yeah right...I'd like to see you guys have your head put under water and see how quickly you adjust!! I was worried that they would slap me in the bum like I have seen on some of the movies.



Anyway, only took a couple of hours before I got the idea. It is really not that hard, you just move your chest up and down and the rest takes care of itself.

One thing though...for the past two weeks I've felt sooo sleepy and really hungry. I know I am giving my mum a really hard time wanting food every couple of hours but at least she has my dad there to help her out a bit and take care of my night feeds.

Last week I was introduced to my new home. My dad carried me around the house and told me where everything was. I must say that my mum and dad has done a fantastic job decorating the room I will be living in when I get a bit older.




I feel that I am very lucky that I have two very loving and caring parents. It is a new experience to them as well as to me, so a bit of a learning curve ahead.
For example the first few days after I arrived home they kept taking my clothes off all the time. They said it was so that they could change something called a 'Nappy'. I don't like the cold so every time they did it I would start crying. Now I know that this is one of the ways they show me that they love me...so I don't mind it so much anymore.



Also, every morning my dad takes me to the bathroom and gives me something he calls a 'Bath'...sounds like Thai to me, but apparently it is supposed to make me clean and smell nice.
It involved my dad using something called 'Water' to first clean my fair and then submerge me into. Silly dad...he should know that I have quite gotten used to do this thing called 'Breathing' now and dont need water.


Anyway, in the beginning I was crying everytime he put me in the water, but I am slowly getting used to the idea as long as the water is warm enough. I still panic once in a while due to the feeling of weightlesness. I prefer when daddy takes me in the shower...I like the feeling of water sprinkled onto my belly. Once in a while I return my love by sprinkling my daddy with warm water too...




My dad and I will give you some future updates on how I am experiencing my new life. I am still getting used to the idea of him taking photos of me. The flashes are really bright! Mummy is worried about my comfort...I love her deerly for her concern. I should be getting more used to him taking photos...he's already told me that he's got so many ideas and I would like to help him. I am still working on the learning how to pose in photos so that I am ready for what he would like me to do...It is hard to look cute when you are put in an unfamiliar basket like above and don't have any control of your arms and legs yet.


I am really pleased to say hello to all of you! I can't wait to meet you all!

Ok, He has now been cleaned up a bit but is still sleeping most of the time.

I brough my camera gear to the ward to take some more (and better) photos than what I could do with the small pocket camera.

On the 7th June in the morning Kim started going into labour.She woke me up at 6am and told me that her water broke...and that it was time to go to the hospital.

When we got there the contractions were only 4-5 minutes apart and pretty irregular. After a few hours they started infusing to move things along. Eventually the contractions were very close and very painful (for Kim), so we aked for an epidural.

As soon as she got the epidural everything stopped and slowed down. Eventually the Obstitrician said that it was time to do a C-section to get the baby out.

It was pretty quick and those critters definitely look like little aliens when they come out.




In the beginning he had a few breathing problems (which apparently is normal with children with ceasar children) so he (and I) was rushed to the nursing care unit for closer observation.




While we were there Kim was eventually rolled past an hour later so that she could have a quick cuddle before herself being rolled up to the ward for observation.

Here's a photo of the very proud mum:



I was still in my operating theatre outfit and here's a photo of the very proud dad too:



He also managed to get a quick feed while he was there.


After spending 4 hours in the care his breathing was relaxed and his carbondioxide levels had dropped he was released and I could roll him up to mummy in the ward for some sleep for both of them.

On the 4th of June 2010 my grandmother (on my dads side) passed away being 90 years old. She had a stroke about a months ago and was unconscious for a long time.



She did regain a bit of conscious to the point where she could nod and recognise people.

After this her condition deteriorated but her being such a tough woman she was hanging on in there.

Eventually she couldn't hand on any longer and passed away. She was the last one of my grandparents and she was burried on the 10th June, 3 days after my son was born, so unfortunately they never got a chance to meet.

Tonight is my GCC break day (Only 11,000 steps today compared to over 20,000 yesterday). I celebrated this with a glass of wine...and then I though why stop there.I could take a cool photo as I was pouring the glass (my second).




I did do a bit of playing around but I found that it worked best if the flash was able to burn out some of the details and illuminate the wine from behind.

Flash was positioned on the floor (glass on a chopping board on a chair) @ 1/4 power...the background is a white wall.

The wine is a Southern Sisters 2003 Cabernet Sauvignon Merlot...not a bad drop for an everyday wine.

I did another photo session with little bob. He was going "More, More...." and Mummy was going "Not again!".

Anyway, had the chance for a couple more creative shots.







Not sure if I like the reflection in this shot...so I may have to re-do it.

Here is another GCC photo

I am currently participating in the GCC (Global Corporate Challenge). This is a team event where each participant has to do more than 10,000 steps per day using a pedometer (step counter) for the next 16 weeks. I will when convenient take my camera with me an try and do something creative.

This was day one where I walked to a meeting in North Sydney over the Sydney harbour bridge. When I got home I did some tilt shift effect to it so make it more toy like:

It is now week 35 and the baby is expected within the next 5 weeks (hopefully at week 40). Kim is getting pretty big and yesterday I used the opportunity to take a couple of photos of her belly (and a worried dad)...evidence below.



I alto tried to take a couple of nice ones as well as some artistic ones.




I would have taken a lot more, but even though the baby was saying "More, More..." the mummy ran out of patience...maybe I'll get another chance during the week to take some more.

Some time ago I saw a photo of a kiwifruit and wanted to see if I could do something similar. It took a bit of experimenting, but eventually I got there. First a thin slice of kiwifruit (I chose to keep the skin on for effect), a couple of toothpicks to lift it off the surface and then one toothpick to hold it upright.

20 cm behind the flice I positioned a flash (SB600) firing at 1/64 power. Camera is set at 1/250th sec, f13, ISO 200 @42mm (on Nikon D50)....viola: