Perfect Moments Photography | A Rene Pallesen Journal

Some years back my mum had a stroke while my parents were traveling in Thailand. This left totally paralysed in the left side of her body and she has been bound to a wheelchair ever since.

The stroke was most likely caused by heavy smoking and drinking and in general an unhealthy lifestyle.

This all happened a few years after my parents retired and were planning to spend most of the winters traveling in warmer countries. They have always been traveling a lot and never liked the winters in Denmark.
The realisation after the stroke for my parents was that suddenly those dreams were burst and that my mum would need constant care. My dad negotiated with the council that they would look after her one week a month which left my dad with some time to realise some of his dreams and at leaft do some traveling and at the same time provide some relief from looking after mum. It has been a hard blow to my mum and it is still very hard for her to accept that she will be bound to a wheelchair and dependent on other people for simple tasks such as going to the toilet, washing and getting dressed.

My mum some time ago discovered that some of the traveling my dad had done hadn't taken place alone but with an old female school friend (How intimate they were/are I don't know and don't care) but obviously my mum got very hurt and set the ultimatum that either he stops seeing her or she moves out. My dad said that he didn't want to stop seeing her and that he would still keep looking after my mum except for that one week every month.

It has now come to the point where my mum has found an apartment in a care facility and it going to move there this month. I am sure that it hurts a lot for her to move out.

Another blow has been that I am getting married in a few months time and that it is not possible for her to attend my wedding but that my dad is. It will be really hard for her on the day itself and I wish there was something I could do to make it easier for her or somehow allow her to attend.

So how do I feel about this? I am disappointed, angry and understanding at the same time. I am angry at my mum because she insisted smoking and drinking the way she did and tat this caused a stroke.

I am angry at my dad that he's found someone else and that is causing my mum to move out...she is the one totally loosing out. I am disappointed that their marriage and thereby also my family is breaking up.

I also understand why my dad has been longing for some company on different level and at the same time I also understand why my mum is so hurt about it. I am hurt because I know that my mum needs some support but that I am so far away but at the same time my life is here and I am about to get married here.I just hope that she understands that my happiness is dependent on me staying here. Especially since the stupid danish immigration laws will prevent me from moving back to Denmark with my future wife.

I am also hurt because my parents during the last decade has been through so much hardship first with my brother, then with the stroke and now with all this.

This is certainly a year of change...

We just finished another grading as a family. This time the boys and Kim graded to their first brown belts and I graded to my third brown belt.

We were supposed to have graded about a month ago, but because of Kims dad's funeral we had to postpone it for a month.

It therefore turned out to be just a mini grading with just the four of us as a family.

Now it will be quite a while before any of us are grading again. The boys need to get a fair bit stronger before grading for the next belt based on the feedback. I will need to start working towards the black, so Kim will probably be the next one grading towards the end of the year.

The boys putting up the tent.

Our campground from across the lake.

Teaching the boys to fish (only caught seaweed).

The kids spent hours climbing up and down this little hill.

Lots of brains trying to put up a gazebo. Eventually we had to consult the instructions.

Sunset scenery

It was raining so we gathered under the canopy.

Lots of curious ducks (waiting to be fed).

Spotted a 2016 vintage from Coonawarra...had to try it.

Scenery from our camp ground.

Great selfie with Lucas and I.

More spectacular scenery.

Cuties in the hammock.

I have seen steam tractors in museums before, but this is the first time I have seen one that is still functioning. This one is from 1913.

One day we went mushroom picking. These ones you definitely can't eat.

And these ones you can.

First time I have seen a Leopard Slug.

A pretty good picking...

The kids found a bird skeleton. It could be a dead lyrebird, or maybe a dodo.

Here are some various photos from first part of 2022.

Here is one of Aiden in his happy space at the Piano and Guitar.

At Cabramatta we sat down having an asian drink. It looked so much like one of the birds from Angry bird that I just had to get a photo. See the resemblance?

This is a Lego truck that Lucas built.

At karate Aiden is sometimes asked to teach the newbies. It is great to see how it gives him confidence.

Aiden went to a birthday party with a Virtual Reality experience...a bit scary for him.

The local corner shop was refitted for a TV show.

Easter egg loot.

What do the boys get up to in their room sometimes???

Family photo at QVB

Having desserts in the city

A seal resting on the rocks at the opera house.

While at Warilla Beach we one day did a walk at the Macquarie Pass National park. This was an easy walk with the reward of a waterfall at the end of the walk.

One one of our trips down south we visited the Nan Tien temple south of Sydney.

It is a Chinese Buddhist temple that is worth a relaxing visit for anyone with some time.

During the Christmas holidays we rented a place at Warilla Beach a couple of hours south of Sydney.

We discovered that the beach has pipies in the sand, so every day we made sure that we harvested a plate full of them for dinner.

We brought Aidens new guitar, so that he was able to practice his music while enjoying the scenery.

The kids also attended online drawing lessons.

It was a beautiful spot to sit on the balcony, enjoy the view and have some great food (including fresh pipies).

One day we also visited the Jambaroo Water park. This was a disappointment with long queues at every ride and Aiden was too scared to do any rides so it was a bit of a miserable day.

Last weekend it was Ethans 21st Birthday. He had a bit party with the whole family and his friends.

They had arranged for catering with lots of Cambodian, Laotian and other asian foods.

It has been three years since I last spent time with my dad. This is due to Australia closing its borders for two years due to the Covid pandemic.

As soon as they announced opening the borders again in February my dad booked his ticket to come a visit.

It was really nice to have him here and different from when he has been here previously. For starters, he was here by himself which was a different dynamic and also Aiden and Lucas have grown older and really enjoyed bonding with 'Bedstefar'. Especially Aiden and my dad found that they had music in common and Aiden took great prise in being able to play some of the pieces on piano that my dad was able to sing.

I really enjoyed having a few beers (and other good stuff) with him while he was here.

A couple of years ago I bough a machine to transfer my dads and grandads old 8mm film to digital. Because of the pandemic I was never able to try it out. My dad brought one of his films to do a trial transfer. It worked really well and he'd now brought it back to Denmark with him to transfer the rest.

One afternoon dad and I went up to the Barrenjoey lighthouse. My dad is still able to do it although he is a bit slower and not as strong as he used to be.

Kims dad passed away 92 years old. He will be greatly missed by his daughters, grandchildren, grandsons and friends.

It was a beautiful funeral following chinese traditions with wearing white clothes to celebrate a long life.

Aiden played a beautiful song on the piano in front of everyone and we had put together slides showing his life.

Day after we did the traditional cleaning of the tomb stone and also the burning of paper clothes and money (theory is that it will then go to the afterlife for him to wear).

I hope that the boys are old enough to remember their time with him.

Even though his old body was failing him, his mind was still sharp enough to play Mahjong and other games with us. These photos are from our last trip with him down to Bowral.

Lucas is part of the schools chess club.

The other day he was very proud that he'd received this award.

My Mums hardship

Home

All brown belts

Camping Lake Lyell

Various 2022

National Park Walk

Nan Tien Temple

Warilla Beach 2022

Ethans 21st Birthday

Dad in Sydney 2022

Father in law passed away

Lucas awesome checkmate award

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