Good news everyone...we are expecting a baby and the stork should be delivering around mid June next year.

I guess most of you guys already know by now....for the rest of you...Surprise!!

It is not unexpected as we were trying.




Now there is a busy time ahead preparing for the baby. Kims wants the baby room painted (Even though in my opinion the baby doesn't care what colour it is).

We will also need to get hold of stuff like prams etc. If there are any baby items that you can spare (especielly items such as car baby seats, pram and changing table) then we would be very grateful.

We don't know if it is a boy or a girl yet (We should know by the end of January).

yesterday it was Kim and I's one year anniversary.

We actually celebrated it on Saturday with a visit to one of Sydney top restaurants called Bilson's.

Yesterday we instead planned to have a nice evening out watching a movie in the evening. Kim was apparently waiting for me to deliver something to her office (or so her colleague said) but after work I was waiting at the car with a bunch of flowers. Kim was so excited to go out in the evening that she forgot to get off the train at our station with the result that she by accident ended up in Parramatta (western Sydney)...it took her one and a half hours to make it to the car...but fortunately the flower still looked fresh.

When we got home I spend some time experimenting with some photos and some lighting of the flowers before we went out, and here are the results. The Macro photos are taking using a 35/50mm lens reversed. The light comes from a single strobe reflected of a mirror.














The movie was really good and entertaining. We saw 2012...and it doesn't pretend to be anything other than what it is.

Every year in October & November there is an exhibition called Sculptures by the Sea. The city exhibits close to 200 sculptures on the stretch of coastline between Bondi and Tamarama. The public can go for a walk and have a look at the sculptures and vote for their favourits...if they are able to find parking that is.

Some of them are really good and some of them at just plain weird.

Here's some photos I took of my favourites.

It has been raining almost constantly for the past two weeks (since the dust storm really) and Andy and I had organised to go climbing in the Blue Mountains together with a friends of his (Dan) who's never been on on real rock before.

We looked a the forecast and it didn't look promising for the mountains so the night before we decided to go to plan B and go to Barrenjoey instead.

The quality of the climbing is more limited, but at least it is a shorter drive and walk-in in case you have to bail.

We arrived up at Palm Beach in the morning and the roads were still soaked in water from all the rain the night before. We therefore decided to stop at a cafe and have some breakfast and let the cliffs dry out a bit before walking in there.

While eating breakfast we were having a look at the latest radar pictures and we could see that it was pouring down in the mountains and we could see rain approaching the Sydney area.

After breakfast we were trying to decide whether we should bail or go climbing. After much procrastination we decided to climb and went to the carpark. Andy pulled out the insect repellent and started rubbing it into his genitals (or so it looked) saying that it would keep the chicks away (which I'm sure his wife appreciates)...or was it ticks.



For Dans benefit we started out on one of the easiest climbs around there called Jezebel. Andy did the first lead and as he finished we could feel the first rain drops. I then did the second climb and once I reached the top the rain became heavier. The plan was to have Dan follow me up so that he could try an absail from the top. Once he reached the top it really started pouring and all of us became drenched while setting up the absail and clearing the gear.

Dan made it down in good style (although nervous) and once I'd made it to the ground as well we quickly packed our gear and headed back home for a nice warm shower.

Mostly a non-climbing day really...but Andy did get his sugar-hit with the pancakes.

Saturday evening Kim and I went with a couple of friends to the Capitol Theatre to see the Broadway play called Wicked.

The play is about how the Wicked witch became wicked in 'The Wizard of Oz'.



The play very cleverly provides the background for the Wizard of Oz.

This was Kims birthday present to me earlier in the year...satisfied the criteria for presents: Must be an experience or a consumable.

It was a really nice evening and the play was very funny...especially the Wizard of Goodness (a real blonde)

The last 24 hours has been the most freak weather I've (and anyone else) has experienced in Sydney.

Yesterday we had 30 degrees during the day and in the evening a huge thunderstorm descended upon Sydney with massive rainfalls and very high winds. Kim found that water was dripping through ceiling and my first though was "This ain't good" and rushed up to check if there was a hole in the roof tiles or in the plumbing (if you see one of the previous posts then you'll notice that we've installed Solar hot water and this system is positioned above that same bathroom).

I could clearly see where the water had come in, but it wasn't through any gaps and it seemed that the strong winds had pushed the water backwards and upwards under the tiles...whew...but I'll have another look next time it rains.

Then this morning I woke up and looked out the window and everything was covered in a bright red and yellow haze and it was blowing a gale. I had a look at the forecast and stuck my head outside the window and it turned out that all of NSW was encapsulated in a massive dust storm with fine red dust coming from the Australian outback.



Everything outside is now covered in this fine dust, cars, windows...everything.

One of out friends too the following photo from his balcony:



The area covered by the dust is huge and apparently it may even reach New Zealand.

This weekend we invited a group of my friends over for BBQ.

The official excuse was for my recovery after my Hernia surgery (which is still causing me some grief some days).

It was a beautiful spring day with 31 degrees in the shade and luckily I had put up a gazebo outside to cover the area and provide a bit of shade.

Most of the day I was attending the BBQ cooking Lamb Cutlets, Fish, Prawns, Vietnamese Sausages and Chicken skewers.

The last batch of chicken skewers I forgot on the BBQ with a very predictable result.



In the evening we had Kim's family over for dinner/BBQ, so a repetition of the afternoon.

This weekend we went to Sasha's and Mavis's wedding.




Family and friends were invited to attend the ceremony at Greenwich at 10am. The location they had chosen had a stunning view of Sydney Harvour and skyline.

When we arrived neither the groom or the bride were there. Approximately 20 minutes later the bride arrived, but still no groom, so she did another round in the car.

Finally at 10.30 Sasha arrived with his dad after having been stuck in traffic, shortly after Mavis arrived in her beautiful wedding dress and the ceremony could get under way.



It was a beautiful ceremony, beautiful location and beautiful weather.

After the ceremony it was photo time.

The reception was at a restaurant called Occilate Wildly in Newtown. The food was nice and at the end of the afternoon everyone went on their way.

During the trip Kim took a number of videos using her compact camera. Here are the best ones (Click on the links to download the videos):

Denmark:

Knights Fighting
Firing Weapon

Italy:

Verona
Aida the Opera 1
Aida the Opera 2
Aida the Opera 3
Aida the Opera 4
San Gimignano
View of Cinque Terre
Cinque Terre from the boat
Driving to Portofino
Portofino
View of Lake Como
Lake Como from the Boat
Driving on mountain roads
Cow (Dont kill the cow)
Switzerland

The week before we went away on holiday I experienced pain in the pelvic area. I quickly got it diagnosed with ultrasound to be a hernia. Furtunately it could wait until we came back from holiday to be fixed although it was giving me some problems along the way carrying suitcases etc.

As soon as we came back I went to see the specialist and he told he that it would have to be fixed with surgery and that he could schedule it for the following week.

In the morning of the surgery I had to be at the hospital at 6.30am in the morning. Surgery started at 9am and by 11am I was awake again released at 1pm.

So it terms of the surgery it was very smooth...but it was very painful afterwards. I had problems standing up and sitting down.


This photo was taken two days after the surgery:



The cut is 13cm long and at this point I am still very much in pain.


The feedback from the doctor was that this was an Indirect Inaugural hernia and apparently the type that can cause a lot of problems later on if not fixed.

Unfortunately part of hernia surgery is that they have to cut some of the nerves so that they don't get caught in the mesh they use to repair it with.


This means that now two and a half weeks after the surgery there is still a large area around the cut that has got no sensation to touch or pain and some areas are hyper sensitive with the result that even the lightest touch is painful.

I hope the eventually all the sensation returns to normal (apparently in 25% of the cases this doesn't happen). I also hope that the scar won't be too bad and will mostly disappear long term.

We went with Donna and Sandra up to Port Stephens to go Whale watching.

It was a great day (very cold) and we saw lots of whales.

Click here to see more photos from: Whale Watching/Slideshow

I went climbing with Andy in New Zealand. We flew onto the glacier at Pioneer hut with a skiplane.

We attempted a couple of peaks in the area but were mainly unsuccessful due to sloshy conditions and late starts. Andy eventually insisted going down after taking a bit of a slide after taking a bit of a slide. We did however get a little bit of climbing done.



Click here to see more photos from: Climbing in New Zealand/Slideshow

Believe it or not, I still have quite a few friends in Denmark. I would like to put photos of all of them here - unfortunately I do not have photos of all of them. If you are one of my friends and your photo is not on this page then please do not despair - I still consider you a friend, and maybe, the next time I go to Denmark, I shall have photos of you all!




Here is one of my best friends in Denmark. This photo was taken quite a while ago, before I came to Australia.

Kenneth is now living here in Sydney, on the beautiful Manly beach - only about a half hour away from me. Kenneth came to stay with me a few months ago. He was trying out a new job, and actually came back! He is going to give Australia a go, to see if he likes it like I do. No more biting winters, lots of warmth and sunshine, beautiful mountains and bush to explore... and I think he has discovered, there are lots of friends to make - especially the pretty fun-going ones with two legs and a skirt! *smile*

He is actually a pretty good cook. Whist he stayed in my apartment for a couple of months, he cooked pot roast with gorgonzola sauce, and also gave a wonderful 3-course dinner for a small group of friends here. About two years after I arrived in Australia, I returned to Denmark for a visit. On the day I arrived in Denmark, he threw together a party for me!









Here is Ester, another one of my friends.

She is a fashion designer and paints some wonderful paintings.






Naturally at parties, there was quite a large amount of beer being consumed (how can you not?? - not possible to have a party otherwise in Denmark.

It was nice to taste one of the annual Christmas beers from Tuborg.
Created: Jan 2000 Last Updated: 16 Sept 2001

Photo Gallery

I have placed photos here - those I could not fit on the respective webpages.



Schwedagon




Mandalay



Marionet




Volleyball



Created: 3 Nov 2001

I initially made plans to explore Burma and then make my way across the border into western China at Burma's only border crossing up north. I had not made any definite plans wanted to play it by ear... but in the end my trip consisted of Thailand, Cambodia and restricted areas to Burma.

I was away for a total of 5 weeks and must admit that parts of my trip really frustrated me - there were many restrictions in Burma and being in Bangkok at times stressed me because of all the tourists and crowds. I really only went to Cambodia to see the magnificent Angkor Wat - actually I really did enjoy being there. I think my most enjoyable part of the trip was the days I had climbing on the secluded areas of Krabi.

Burma (23 Jul ~ 5 Aug)	Cambodia (6 ~ 10 Aug)	Thailand

There were quite a lot of monkeys at Mt Popa.











The photo above in the middle, shows monkeys that look like they are playing around. They are actually fighting monkeys and can be very dangerous because they bite and also snatch things from you.

They were rather oblivious to me being there, until the flash on my camera went off. Then their attention was on me and they were ready to attack.

I adopted the “monkey mentality” - avoid eye contact and move away backwards - the only way to stop the monkeys from attacking is to not look at them.

Whilst I was up north, I watched a rather interesting game of volleyball.

I have never seen such dexterity and agility amongst the players!

It was amazing to see how flexible these guys were.

There is a monastry on Mt Popa - a hill located 50km away from Bagan.

When I was there, it was a cloudy day.



I ran into a woman selling petrified wood - quite silly really, considering the place was covered with it.




They must think tourists are stupid! *laugh* I managed to pick up a couple of small pieces to take back with me.

As you can see, there are stacks of them around.

And no... this is not a tombstone.
This is actually a road sign.



You would be surprised how big some of these pieces are - this piece below was actually about a metre long and 40cm wide.



Actually what I found interesting were the toilets in Burma.

My girlfriend tells me that squatting over a toilet is quite common in Asia.

In many of the city areas, they would have toilets as we know them, and they would also have a carved hole in the ground, on which either side, one places their feet on.

Toilets in the rural area are more crude than that - a hole leading into a gaping pit.

However, what I found interesting about these toilets were that recycled running water was used to wash away any excrement. The water is first used for washing one self and then used in the toilets.

As there were a few toilet cubicles a row, sometimes you would see the excrement from a toilet uphill go beneath you! *laugh*

Very clever and environmental system, I think!




Trying to grab a snooze... *smile*

Like Schweddagon, most of this is real gold as well.

And yes, there is a monkey sitting near my head.

If you click to the next page, you will see that I have taken a series of photos of the monkeys.

I saw the most interesting puppet show, known as the “Mandalay Marionettes”

There were 2 or 3 puppeteers out the front, with a live band of musicians.

Unfortunately, it was more of a show for the tourists, rather than the locals.

It cost 1,000 chats or US$2 per show.

I decided take a 20-hour train-ride to Myitkyinã *laugh* it took 20-hours to get there by train because there was only one track.

It was definitely faster to run next to the train than to travel in it!

We had to wait for the oncoming train to return before we could travel north.

At one point, we crossed a bridge that was so rickety that I thought it would collapse any moment!







Locals working in the rice fields.






Locals using water-buffaloes to plough rice fields.





The train travelled along the Jrrawaddy River.

It would have been nice if I was able to travel to Mandalay via a riverboat down the Jrrawaddy River.





It was amazing to find out that people live “on” these lakes, by building houses on stilts.

This sort of housing is quite common in many parts of Asia, especially areas where monsoons quite frequently flood an area.

It is also very environmentally-sound, I think, and hurts the land less.

Most of the houses are made of wood.







Myitkyinã is pretty dismal in rain!



There is a huge drug problem in Burma, especially through the crossings into China.

I have scanned a copy of a recent newspaper article about this problem in Burma.

On Sunday the 16th November 2008 I got married to Kim. It was a fantastic day and thanks to family and friends joining us making this a very memorable day.


My day started out (Kims started much earlier) in the morning with my Best Man (Andy) as well as a number of other friends coming over to my house picking up trays, organising ribbons on cars and picking up supplies for the wedding ceremony.

Kim had earlier in the morning left the house to go to her dads place to get dressed and have hair and makeup done.

Once we got the call saying that she was ready we drove over to her dads place and on the way there we were stopped by the police who insisted on breath testing us...sorry guys you were out too early, we hadn't started drinking yet.

At Kims place I had to bribe my way in through the door before they would let me in...all part of the tradition.



Once I was let in my friends carried the trays of fruit, wine and noodles upstairs and this was the first time I saw Kim looking absolutely gorgeous in her wedding dress.
We then started the Tea Ceremony where we first had to pay respect to the elders by burning incense and then serve tea to the parents. In return they would then present us with red envelopes containing money and Kim's dad also gave Kim an old bracelet and ring that used to belong to her mum.



After the Tea ceremony I drove down to La Perouse where the wedding ceremony was going to take place. We were a bit early so they were still getting ready. The wind was really strong so the garden arch needed wires to stay in place etc.

Once all the guests has arrived (around 40-50) Kim arrived in Nancys car with her bridesmaid (Natalie) and the ceremony could begin.



Kim and I had decided and written most of the ceremony ourselves and the celebrant presented it beautifully (and very loud).



After the ceremony we had some drinks and snacks with out guests and then took pictures for the next couple of hours around La Perouse and Centenial Park.

















Later in the afternoon we went back to our house to relax and freshen up for an hour until we then went to the Reception.



We had invited 80 guests and they all arrived (more or less). People were greated out the front where they were served canabes and drinks and there was a pianist playing a piano.

People were then seated and once everyone were at the tables the bridal party was introduced.









After the entrees My dad and Andy held their speeches (both very good and unfortunately mostly true) and after the main courses it was the turn of KC and myself.

To everyones surprise we had arranged entertainment during the evening in the form of some drummers. Everyone was given a drum and had to participate in the drumming.



This also involved us dancing as part of the entertainment.

This was eventually followed by us cutting the wedding cake (a tower of cupcakes) a then dance the bridal walz.






Kim had changed to a more practical dress for the bridal walz and she looked absolutely stunning in it. Because I'd been sunburnt during the day my face almost matched the dress.

End of October we moved settled and moved into the new house. Not without a bit of of drama as the previous owner wasn't out of the house at settlement...but by the end of the day she was fortunately gone.

She was living there with three little boys (terrorists), so there was a number of smaller things that had been neglected and really needed some attention and there were a number of flaws around the place that needed fixing (it seems that the solution to every problem for the previous owners was silicone glue).

Most of this is under control now thanks to my dad helping out while here for the wedding (see next posting). Both Kim and I have now moved all our things and I've put kim in charge of selecting what colours she would like the walls to be downstairs before we go out and buy furniture.

We also need to get new lights downstairs as the ones there heat up and switch themselves off (cheap crap) so I may just as well do the ceiling now that I am at it.

My dad was in Sydney for our wedding and arrived on the 5th November just in time for us to also celebrate his birthday (We took him to his favourite steak house to get his favourite T-bone steak).

It was great to have him here for the wedding as it would have been empty to not have any family members from my side at the wedding. It was also really sad that my mum couldn't come.

We had just moved into the house week before so everything was still messy and there was a lot of things that needed fixing on the house. My dad was really helpful helping me out with a lot of the thing I'd never done before such as replacing tiles in the bathroom. He also changed the locks, fixed lights, painted walls, fixed doors, leaking taps etc.

It gave us something to do together which was great for bonding. I just wish he'd been there a bit longer...but maybe I can convince him to come back to help me build a pergola.

We also managed to do a bit of sightseeing around Sydney and it was great that he got a chance to meet Kims family.



The wedding was something different for him and I think that he was pretty frustrated that he didn't know what the asian customs were (not a typical Danish wedding).

He did give a really good speech at the wedding and I'm sorry to say that everything he said is true (although not everything was accurate).

This weekend we went up to Barrenjoey...a beautiful day. It was 31 degrees in Sydney but this time of the year the rocks here are mostly in the shade all day and there was a nice sea breeze running through the area.

We started with a couple of nice warm-ups and then moved onto one of my test pieces "Pillar of Mordor (19)". It is thin and sustained and really not very well protected so I have always back off leading it. Both Phil and I did lead it although not completely clean.

After this we did "Mescalito (19)" which is one of my favourite climbs there. Phil placed a cam in one of the breaks and it fell out and dropped down to the next bolt...fortunately he carried another cam to put in the break and eventually got up to the next bolt and through the climb.

The day was almost over and I had to go to the airport but Phil had his eyes on this climb "...Cab Sav (19)". The bottom bit of the climb is all protected by cams and the top bit is really thin and pumpy. Phil got up past the natural gear and clipped the first bolt. He then moved on and was struggling when clipping the second bolt but eventually got it. He then moved to the thirt and last bolt on the climb and as he moved up his foot caught the quickdraw and without him noticing the boltplate came off the bolt (He had clipped the botlplate upside down). He kept climbing up and got up to the third bolt, but because the previous bolt had fallen off it would have been a ground fall if he had fallen off. Phil was really struggling clipping it but we were so relieved on the ground once he did.

That was a really close one and it is the second time I've seen someone clip those types of plates wrong...bloody dangerous.

We have bought a house now. We have signed the contract from our part and paid the deposit and our solicitor has received the signed contract from the Vendor. The property has now finally been pulled off the market by the real estate agent (that idiot) and we are looking at moving into the new place in mid/late October (before 24th October). Now we just need to go through all the mortgage application documents which if anything like last time I applied for a home load will be a lot of bureaucracy filling out triplicates, getting copies certified by rocket scientists (whom you have known for at least 40 years and who have worked in the industry since the Apollo program).




This will be perfect as it means that Kim and I will have something to live in after the wedding (The current apartment is not really suitable and I would like Kim to feel like it is her home as well).The place is in Botany in the Eastern Suburbs and it is very close to Kim's family (about a 200 meter walk to one of her sisters and 5 minutes drive from her dad). And more importantly it is reasonably close to the city (10km) and away from the flight path of the airport.


We don't have much furniture so the place will be a bit empty in the beginning until we get the essentials. Kims sister has already donated us a dining table but we need to get items such as a bed and a washing machine immediately and then also items such as a sofa, entertainment unit etc.


It is a terrace house and has got the potential to do some really nice things to it. It is spacious on the inside and has got a small backyard that doesn't require too much maintenance. There is a bit of painting and maintenance that needs to be done immediately to the outdoor areas but nothing that cannot be managed. I am also sure that Kim would like have some painting done internally. My dad will arrive just after we have moved in so I am sure he won't get bored while here.




This Torrens title oversized terrace offers an ease of living combined with great design features spread over three very generous levels. Be immediately impressed by the flawless presentation and the impeccable renovation of this striking tri-level terrace. Enjoying an elevated position.
A handy convenient setting with ample street parking. Generous living with separate formal and casual areas. Tranquil north facing backyard and outdoor entertaining. Modern kitchen with breakfast bar stainless steel appliances. Upstairs bedrooms with built-ins, two with private balconies. Well appointed for care free modern living. Intelligently designed to maximise space and light. Dressed in fresh contemporary tones and polished floors
Automatic garage for two cars with internal access. Easy walk to local parks, schools, shops and transport


If you read the score further down in this blog, then you will know that the score now is 4 out of 5...just the wedding to complete to get 5 big events done within the same 6 months timeframe.

This weekend we went climbing up at Berowra (northern part of Sydney). It has been raining a lot and been very cold lately, but this day was sunny and very pleasant so no need for the down jacket and the gloved that I had brought with me.

Andy had just bought a new HD video camera and was keen to try it out and he got some really good footage og me climbing as well as Phil falling. Click here to see video


I actually had a really bad day climbing. I think work is stressing me out at the moment and one one of the first few climbs I freaked out when I got to a section with only slopers as hand holds (if you see the video then it was at the section where Phil shouts "YES!"). I was pretty upset when it happened and I was unable to get back into the right headspace.

The rest of the afternoon I was doing top ropes but had blown my strength and self esteem.

Last week I was in Brisbane for some SharePoint training for the company. It was four days of intensive training but it was worth it and it was nice going up north where it is a bit warmer than here in Sydney at the moment.

I flew up there Tuesday morning leaving home at 5am to catch a 6am flight. It was the morning after my Birthday so Kim and I decided to just have a quiet evening and then celebrate some other time (Kim is going to take me to a nice restaurant).



I found a couple of good restaurants in Brisbane and one night I had Moreton Bay Bugs (Look like a giant cockroach). I also went for a walk to Kangaroo Point which is a big climbing area along the river in Brisbane. It is all lit up and actually looks like good climbing. I was surprised to find people climbing at night and also surprised to find that almost everyone was toproping rather than lead climbing (Everything is nicely bolted so there really is no excuse).

This year we again went skiing on the weekend closest to my birthday. We tried to get the same house as we did last year, but unfortunately it was already booked so we had to settle for an apartment. This did mean that we only had two bedrooms instead of three so it was only Soeren and Nui (and Freja) and Kim and I staying there. Kims ex-colleague Mark had to settle with staying at a caravan park.

The first day Soeren and I drove up to Perisher in my new car (first long trip in it) while the girls did their own thing. When we got back late afternoon after a whole day of skiing they had organised all the ingredients for a nice BBQ and marinated all the meat…yummy. Mark came over for dinner with Daniel and we had a nice evening with a couple of bottles of wine.

Next morning we got a late start (it took the other guys a bit of time to get ready) and we went to hire some additional gear for the girls to go skiing as well. This time we went to Thredbo which is much better in terms of variation of the runs and also the length. The longest run there is 3.7 kilometers. The girls took an instructor class (I think it is better if Kim gets an instructor by herself next time as she will get more attention).



It was a fairly short skiing day as we finished at three and then went on our way to the 5+ hour drive back to Sydney. Next year I think I'll take a lesson as well...I am getting pretty good at it now, but just need a few pointers to get even better especially at black runs and moguls.

About two months ago a crashed and wrote off my old car...pretty silly but what can you do. Fortunately it was old and was already starting to cause problems and cost me a lot in repairs. Kim had already hinting that maybe it was time to get a new car and that the car was trying to tell me something.
The car was 11 years, the engine was leaking every fluid imaginable and the gearbox was slipping and there was rust developing so the timing to get a new car was pretty good.

The insurance paid me a good price for the old car...a lot more than I would have received if I had used it as a tradein to buy a new one.

After chasing around the city for a second hand car...amongst which there were some pretty dodgy deals the choice came down to either buy an 6 months old ex-rental or a new one. There was a $4000 difference and by the end of the day the decision came down to us needing that money once we buy a property so I decided to get the ex-rental. It is a nice blueish gray (Aztec Blue) Toyota Corolla. It will have its first test run this weekend when we go down to the snow in it.




Kim and I could probably have gotten by with just one car, but hers is too small to fit golf gear, ski & climbing gear etc. into and the new car is harder for her to drive because of the size...so for now we'll have two cars.


The score so far is:

Kim new job: Done
Rene new job: Done
New car: Done
Wedding: Pending
House: Pending


3 out of 5 aint bad

Some years back my mum had a stroke while my parents were traveling in Thailand. This left totally paralysed in the left side of her body and she has been bound to a wheelchair ever since.

The stroke was most likely caused by heavy smoking and drinking and in general an unhealthy lifestyle.

This all happened a few years after my parents retired and were planning to spend most of the winters traveling in warmer countries. They have always been traveling a lot and never liked the winters in Denmark.
The realisation after the stroke for my parents was that suddenly those dreams were burst and that my mum would need constant care. My dad negotiated with the council that they would look after her one week a month which left my dad with some time to realise some of his dreams and at leaft do some traveling and at the same time provide some relief from looking after mum. It has been a hard blow to my mum and it is still very hard for her to accept that she will be bound to a wheelchair and dependent on other people for simple tasks such as going to the toilet, washing and getting dressed.


My mum some time ago discovered that some of the traveling my dad had done hadn't taken place alone but with an old female school friend (How intimate they were/are I don't know and don't care) but obviously my mum got very hurt and set the ultimatum that either he stops seeing her or she moves out. My dad said that he didn't want to stop seeing her and that he would still keep looking after my mum except for that one week every month.


It has now come to the point where my mum has found an apartment in a care facility and it going to move there this month. I am sure that it hurts a lot for her to move out.

Another blow has been that I am getting married in a few months time and that it is not possible for her to attend my wedding but that my dad is. It will be really hard for her on the day itself and I wish there was something I could do to make it easier for her or somehow allow her to attend.


So how do I feel about this? I am disappointed, angry and understanding at the same time. I am angry at my mum because she insisted smoking and drinking the way she did and tat this caused a stroke.

I am angry at my dad that he's found someone else and that is causing my mum to move out...she is the one totally loosing out. I am disappointed that their marriage and thereby also my family is breaking up.

I also understand why my dad has been longing for some company on different level and at the same time I also understand why my mum is so hurt about it. I am hurt because I know that my mum needs some support but that I am so far away but at the same time my life is here and I am about to get married here.I just hope that she understands that my happiness is dependent on me staying here. Especially since the stupid danish immigration laws will prevent me from moving back to Denmark with my future wife.


I am also hurt because my parents during the last decade has been through so much hardship first with my brother, then with the stroke and now with all this.


This is certainly a year of change...