Needless to say that I saw a lot of animals while in Kenya.

I don't know how it is today, but back then they were everywhere in the national parks.

Here is some of the Rhinos we saw.












Elephants were plentiful.




Lots of cheetahs.










And lots of lions.



























Their kittens.










Lots of Hippos (Lots of these in Lake victoria) and they would be grazing on the golf course across the street.



Hyenas




The vultures eating the remains of the kills.




And of cause loads of zebras and various gazelles.

My time in Kenya was every kids dream.

I got see and do things that few other kids had a chance of doing and it definitely had a big impact on my adult life.



Living at Lake Victoria gave me the chance of catching the biggest fish I have ever caught (A 56pound/25kg Nile Perch).



I also caught the smallest fish I have ever caught in that same lake.




We didn't need fancy fishing gear, just a stick with a piece of line on it.



Life, going to school and emerged in a different culture was a different kind of life (This is our house maid, my brother and my grandmother in front of our house).





This is Filistus another of our house maids. She was working for us most of our time there (we found out the she died from a bad case of malaria years after we left).





Here we are riding a 100 year old turtle.



Life with my brother was also very different. He discovered his talent for Tennis in Kenya and could whoop most of the adults arse when he was 12yo.






No hair dressers around so we also had the worst hair cuts.







There wasn't a lot of Europeans around so we'd know most with a 100km radius.



Family life was simple (not TV) but good.










Our dog was part of the family and made quite a few trips to Kenya.





Every afternoon was spent at the Nyanza Country club where Claus played Tennis and we went swimming.

I taught myself to swim and owe these days to how solid a swimmer I am today...I got really upset that I couldn't swim and my stubborness kicked in and I became determined to learn...fast.



Some of the less memorable moments were the school plays where I was dressed up as a big bird.



Here is one of Claus singing in the choir.

I have started going through some of the old photos on my computer and will start post some of them on my blog.

The first one I stumbled upon one of my class photos from Kenya from 1981/82 when I went to Kisumu Primary School.

I was the only white person in my class (we were 5-6 europeans in the whole school)

One evening while staying at the farm we went to the Hunter Valley gardens to check out the light show and the mega bugs.





There were lots of really creepy insects around the garden and they were all moving and making sounds.






The light show was also really good and there were a couple of new things compared to last year.



And we also spend a bit more time in the story garden.







And the story about girls and boys is 'different'...






...but maybe true for these little monkeys.

At the end of the summer holidays we made a trip up north to Broke (Hunter Valley) with the kids and some friends to stay at an Alpaca farm.




It didn't take long for Aiden to get comfortable with feeding the Alpacas but Lucas was a bit more hesitant and was happy to just observe or throw the food at them.










The Alpacas also provided them with a biology lesson teaching them about the bees and the flowers.




We also did a bit of wine tasting while we were in that part of the hunter.









But the kids were more interested in playing outside and chasing the cat.

My New Years resolution for this year is to get healthy.

By this I don't mean that I will try and become super fit and start running marathons. No, I just mean that I want to get to a stage where I feel healthy, do a bit of exercise, have a healthy mental state and generally eat healthy.

I started really well on this last year, but about half way through I started getting sick all the time (like every 2-3 weeks).

 


This time around I want to have 2 months without getting sick and then I will start some easy to moderate exercise again.

I want to see if I can get back to running again.

Here is a fun little street sign. This is a place I wanna live...

This year we celebrated Christmas eve with the boys.

5 days before Christmas I still hadn't taken our annual family photo even though I had the concepts loosely worked out in my head.

I knew that I wanted to do one in the kitchen and one evening when Kim decided she wanted to experiment with cooking brownies I decided to set it up and talked her through the concept and what I wanted her and the kids to do.
It worked out better than expected.



Kim also wanted one of us unpacking gifts.

This one was a lot harder to set up as the light was critical.




The last family photo we did was a simple one taken in the morning at Maroubra beach.

In one of the shops at Eastgardens I found a wall full of these inspirational notes for 2015.

A couple of days ago the kids were playing in the park at Kims dads place while a big storm was approaching.

The light was beautiful so I couldn't resist snapping a couple of photos with my phone.

Between Christmas and New year we went to the Hunter Valley with Sasha and his family.

We stayed overnight in a cabin in Lovedale.




During the day we tasted wines at the various wineries (found some good ones).






















The kids also loved playing at the cabin in the evenings.

This year we decided not to celebrate on the eve of the 24 and just stick with the 25th at KC's place (too much cooking otherwise). I was responsible for the Christmas ham (with limited success).

It was a relaxing day and the kids were very exited about their presents.

Sometimes when I am setting up for a photo especially Aiden likes to jump in a get silly.

It is a good way to test the lighting and sometimes I managed to get a 'keeper' such as this one from a few weeks back.

It is almost Christmas and I've just completed our annual family Christmas photo and this is the final version.



It was an interesting process getting to this photo this year. Last year we did a photo in the kitchen of us baking a cake, but this years photo has so many more elements to it.

The idea came from a combination of Kim and my ideas. Kim wanted to do a photo of the boys through a crystal ball. I actually bought the crystal ball right after Christmas last year with this year in mind.

We did a test in front of the tree in early December which was reasonably okay, but Kim didn't like the feel to it. She wanted more snow (pretty ambitious on a summers day here in Sydney Australia).



My idea for our family photo was based on me wanting to do a story of us as a family out in a snow storm 'Looking for Santa'. I had purchased a bag of artificial snow and a Christmas cape a few months back and we had some lanterns downstairs so I pretty much had all the components in place for the shoot.

I knew I had to do it as a composite with the boys as there was no way that I would be able to get the photo with all four of us at once. We did the photo over a couple of days, on the first evening (after the kids had gone to bed) I took the one of Kim and myself holding the lantern. Once I had this photo I could show it to Aiden and Lucas so that they knew what we needed them to do (Lucas just had to copy Aiden).



I had Gaffa taped markers on the floor so everyone would know where they were supposed to stand. Inside the lantern I had hidden a speedlight gelled with CTO to make it look light the lantern was lit. We are actually lit by a large Einstein strobe also with CTO, grid and barn doors to control the spill of the light.
At the back left and right were another two speedlights providing a bit of rim light to emulate moon light.

Because of the first 'failed' attempt of the crystal ball I got the idea to extend my 'Looking for Santa' photo into Santa's shed where he would have a crystal ball where he could look at us looking for him.
This would require three components - The crystal ball, the lights from the Christmas tree to create atmosphere and then Santa himself. I created Santa by hanging a hat on a chair which was easy to light and then I had another light which I used to balance the ambient with the lights from the tree.

The final photo all combined looks like the following, but in the end we decided to just use the tighter crop in the first and final photo.

It was time again for the annual Christmas concert with Aiden and Lucas' daycare.

Aiden is starting 'big' school after Christmas, so this was also his graduation.



Kim and Aiden had both practiced some dancing and songs for the concert and were both dressed up, Aiden as a doctor and Lucas as a pumpkin.





Although Aiden was very excited leading up to the concert and was telling everyone how he was going to sing and dance, he absolutely broke down once we got there overwhelmed by all the people and the noise.

It was heartbreaking to see him like that on an evening where he should be enjoying himself. He was crying and didn't want to get on the stage. Eventually we managed to get him up and he did try and participate.





Lucas on the other hand had a great time, unfortunately I didn't get a lot of photos of that because I had to try and comfort Aiden.





After the show Santa turned up wit presents for the kids and he was a lot happier again.







After that the graduates had their photos taken and had cake.

This month Kim and I had our anniversary.

I cant believe we have been married for 7 years...still love her to bits.

Saturday Kim and I went to the Sydney Opera house to watch the Sleeping Beauty performed by the Australian Ballet.



It was one of the better ballets we have seen. The story was great and the dancing (lots of it) was of a really high quality.

The even managed to weave in some of the Red riding hood story, Puss in boots, Cinderella and other stories.

It was beautiful to watch.

Last night Kim and I went to the show Velvet at the Sydney Opera House.

It was a combination of circus, burlesque and boogie nights (70's music) in one show.




The show had great music with Marcia Hines and Brendan Maclean and the performers were great. I think everyones favourite was the guy with the hula hoops.

I don't know for sure which ones are Claus and which ones are Rene.

This post is mostly about Claus when he was at his top as one of Denmarks top tennis players.

I have kept scans of all the newspaper clippings from when he was winning a lot of tournaments.





























































In the mid 90's he started to get pretty sick and although he still tried to play tennis it was never at the same level again. Eventually he more or less gave up. His illness took to great a hold of him. These are some of the 'darkest' photos I have of him while he was struggling with his schizophrenia and were taken shortly before I moved to Australia.





He lost contact with most of his friends and was very dependent on my mum and dad as well as other support programs in place.







I prefer to remember him as he was before he passed away.


















This poem reminds me of him.

The morning after I killed myself, I woke up.

I made myself breakfast in bed. I added salt and pepper to my eggs and used my toast for a cheese and bacon sandwich. I squeezed a grapefruit into a juice glass. I scraped the ashes from the frying pan and rinsed the butter off the counter. I washed the dishes and folded the towels.
The morning after I killed myself, I fell in love. Not with the boy down the street or the middle school principal. Not with the everyday jogger or the grocer who always left the avocados out of the bag. I fell in love with my mother and the way she sat on the floor of my room holding each rock from my collection in her palms until they grew dark with sweat. I fell in love with my father down at the river as he placed my note into a bottle and sent it into the current. With my brother who once believed in unicorns but who now sat in his desk at school trying desperately to believe I still existed.

The morning after I killed myself, I walked the dog. I watched the way her tail twitched when a bird flew by or how her pace quickened at the sight of a cat. I saw the empty space in her eyes when she reached a stick and turned around to greet me so we could play catch but saw nothing but sky in my place. I stood by as strangers stroked her muzzle and she wilted beneath their touch like she did once for mine.

The morning after I killed myself, I went back to the neighbors’ yard where I left my footprints in concrete as a two year old and examined how they were already fading. I picked a few daylilies and pulled a few weeds and watched the elderly woman through her window as she read the paper with the news of my death. I saw her husband spit tobacco into the kitchen sink and bring her her daily medication.

The morning after I killed myself, I watched the sun come up. Each orange tree opened like a hand and the kid down the street pointed out a single red cloud to his mother.

The morning after I killed myself, I went back to that body in the morgue and tried to talk some sense into her. I told her about the avocados and the stepping stones, the river and her parents. I told her about the sunsets and the dog and the beach.

The morning after I killed myself, I tried to unkill myself, but couldn’t finish what I started.

—Meggie Royer