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14. March 2010 08:17
by Rene Pallesen
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Week 25

14. March 2010 08:17 by Rene Pallesen | 0 Comments

week 25


It is now week 25 and almost the third trimester. Kim is certainly getting a lot bigger these days but is still very active with swimming, yoga and walking (According to Kim baby is very active too). Both baby and mum are so far doing fine.


Week 25


They say that most of the growth is in the third trimester...she could be huge!


We have finished painting the baby room and we have bought the most essential furniture such as a cot, a chest of drawers, car seats etc. It is now up to Kim to decorate the room so that it looks nice.

13. March 2010 09:05
by Rene Pallesen
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Taste of Sydney

13. March 2010 09:05 by Rene Pallesen | 0 Comments

taste of sydney


Today Kim and I met up with Sasha and his wife to go to 'Taste of Sydney'. This is an annual event where the premier restaurants of sydney and food and wine producers showcase their food and wine.

This year it was held in Centennial park which is the largest park in sydney which is pretty convenient for us.

At the event they had what the call 'Chef's table'. This is where you can sit down with the chefs of some of the premier restaurants and they will tell you about their restaurants, their food and you can ask them questions. In the mean time they were serving us seafood, wine and cheese (I discovered a new cheese that I in particular really liked).





They also had showcases where some of the chefs from some of sydney best restaurants show you how to cook different dishes. We went to one session where we saw Matt Moran from Aria prepare a lovely cured trout. This was cured like Gravad laks using salt, sugar, coreander and fennel and then cured a secod time using dijon mustard and dill.

Cured Trout


The different restaurants were also having some of their food for sale. Some of it was quite nice (I had a nice yellowfin tuna), but I don't think it was a proper representation of their food. It is difficult to prepare and cook in large quantities without access to proper kitchen facilities, so most of the food was more fancy fast food.








10. March 2010 10:05
by Rene Pallesen
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King Lear

10. March 2010 10:05 by Rene Pallesen | 0 Comments

king lear


Last weekend Kim and I went to see King Lear at the Sydney Opera House. Kim had managed to get cheap preview tickets on the third row from the stage which is pretty unheard of.

King Lear

The play wasn't anything fancy in terms of stage production, costumes or anything (Actually some of the actors were wearing fairly modern denim jeans).

On the side of the stage they had positioned a drumkit and a girl was banging away all throughout the first half of the performance. I found this very distracting and annoying since I was already trying hard to concentrate on understanding the old Shakespearean English.

During the second half they moved the drumkit off the stage, so I must say that I actually started to enjoy the play a lot more.

Given that we got pretty cheap tickets I found the evening pretty good value, but I don't think I'd pay full price for this one.

22. February 2010 02:04
by Rene Pallesen
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Swimming at Maroubra

22. February 2010 02:04 by Rene Pallesen | 0 Comments

swimming at maroubra


Sunday I convinced Kim that we should go to the Beach. I wanted to try my underwater casing for my pocket camera in the waves to see if I could get some good photos. In 2000 I went to the World Press Photo exhibition and saw these great underwater photos from the surf and was inspired to see if I could re-create them.


Kim insisted that we picked up a beach shelter on the way there so that she would have some shade. We found on in K-Mart and then went on our way to the beach.

The first few minutes folding up the beach shelter was a disaster (It was one of those quick fold out ones where you just pull a string...junk!!) and eventually we just threw it all back in the bag deciding to return it on the way home (we'll get a pop-up one instead).


Taking the photos turned out to be a lot trickier than expected. It was fairly windy and the visibility wasn't great. Also the pocket camera tries to auto focus prior to taking the photo which was difficult with everything moving around constantly so most of the time the camera didn't take the photo.It was also quite hard to aim the camera while being battered around by the waves.








I did however manage to take these photos that turned out somewhat alright. I might try again one day when the conditions are better (and I've figured out how to lock the focus on the camera)

22. February 2010 01:12
by Rene Pallesen
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Uncle and Auntie in Sydney

22. February 2010 01:12 by Rene Pallesen | 0 Comments

uncle and auntie in sydney


For the past three weeks my uncle and auntie (Eli & Henning) has been travelling in New Zealand with a tour group.

On the way home they did a 24 hour stopover with the group so do some quick sightseeing before continuing their journey.

They had a tightly packed program arriving late in the afternoon, out for a late dinner and then spend then morning next day on a tour around the city before heading back to the airport.

Kim and I managed to catch up with them in the evening for dinner at Nicks at King Street Wharf. Afterwards we went for a walk down to Circular Quay so that they could have a look at the Harbour bridge and the Opera House at night.

Dinner with Eli and Henning

By the time we got back to the hotel it was midnight and they had to check out of their hotel early next morning.

We hope that they enjoyed the sightseeing the day after (it was a fairly warm day) and that they had a good journey back to Denmark. Apparently there is a lot of snow there currently so they were prepared for the fact that they would have to do a fair bit of digging to get to their car and into their house.

It is not very often that we have visiting family from Denmark so it is always a pleasure to see them.

19. February 2010 05:00
by Rene Pallesen
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More garden critters

19. February 2010 05:00 by Rene Pallesen | 0 Comments

more garden critters


This weekend I was cutting down the bouganvillae in the garden. Whenever I cut down some of the vegetation in the garden it is always interesting what insects I discover in the process. Because of the variety of plants there is always something new to discover. I try not to use pesticides in the garden itself...better to just let nature find a balance.

On this occation I discovered a large Garden spider and a Green Praying mantis (I have seen a Mantis before in the garden and they are great to have a pest control). Both are totally harmless.



Green Praying Mantis Common garden spider


This is what a website had to say about this Common Garden Spider:

"Now this is your classic common garden spider from Sydney. The Australian Museum page on garden orb weaving spiders tells me there is a second, almost identical species (edulis) but that that lives further inland. There must be hundreds of people each summer who can be seen jumping madly up and down in their gardens swiping at themselves just to be sure to get rid of this guy from their clothing after they've walked through a web. Although certainly large enough, this spider is reluctant to bite humans. "


Last week I did however see a redback spider on the other side of the house. Needless to say that I killed it before I got a chance to take a photo (They are extremely venoumous and the closest relative to a Black Widow). To be honest it is the first time I've seen one in the wild for more that 10 years so fortunately they are very rare.

13. February 2010 07:35
by Rene Pallesen
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Open Air Cinema

13. February 2010 07:35 by Rene Pallesen | 0 Comments

open air cinema


This saturday Kim had booked tickets for 'The wolf man' at the open air cinema.



Every year in January and February Sydney hosts a number of events such as operas, concerts and cinemas.

The open Air cinema is located at Ms Macquaries Chair in the botanical garden overlooking the city, the opera house and the bridge.

Open Air Cinema

Open Air Cinema

It is a spectacular setting, especially when the weather is really nice as it was saturday (last year it was pouring down with rain). This years all the seats were sold out within 30 minutes, but Kim was quick to get a couple (smart cookie).

Even though we got there two hours early most of the seats had already been taken. We did manage to find two seats that were really good eventually (we were worried that we'd have to sit on one of the first rows right in front of the screen.


Opera House

The movie was about warewolves and it was funny to listen to people reaction when large fruit bats from the botanical garden flew down in front of the set.

2. February 2010 03:08
by Rene Pallesen
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Hamilton Island 2010

2. February 2010 03:08 by Rene Pallesen | 0 Comments

hamilton island 2010


This weekend we went for an extended (4 nights) weekend to Hamilton Island with Kims Family.

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Hamilton Island is located 1500 kilometers north of Sydney (2.5 hours flight) in the Whitsundays group of islands near the great barrier reef.

This time of the year it is rain season up there and the first three days it was raining a fair bit. This didn't stop us from spending time in the pool or at the beach though. In the evenings we would spend time in the cocktail bars, dining our or playing blackjack.

Click here for more photos

On the first and the last morning morning we did some catemaran sailing. The wind was a bit patchy with periods with no wind and other with lots of wind.The last day however was beautiful and I gave Kim a very basic first course in sailing after which she took over the steering.


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Click here to see a video from the catemaran


One of the other days there was too much wind for them to allow the catemarans going out. I managed to convince the people at the beach to let me take out one of the windsurfers. It was a pretty short session as I found that I am totally out of shape but as least Chong managed to have a bit of a go as well.

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Click here to see a video from the windsurfing


We booked an afternoon of snorkeling up near Hayman island. It was a day with pretty rough seas and even though it was a pretty big boat it was really thrown around and a lot of people on the boat got sea sick (Dylan got a bit sick, but otherwise everyone else in the family was ok). After about an hour of sailing the captain said that the seas were too rough and that the water was too murky and dangerous to continue, so he cancelled the trip and returned to port. A bit of a disappointment, but at least we got a refund and a bit of a sailing trip out of it.

Click here for more photos


I brought a waterproof pouch for my pocket camera which meant that I could take photos under the water and while sailing. This resulted in some pretty good photos in the pool.

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The kids (Kims nephews and niece) recently started swimming lessons. They are still a little uncomfortable with the water although this did improve while we were at Hamilton. Especially Ethan is not very comfortable as you can tell from this video:

Video of Ethan swimming


We also took some nice photos of some of the local wildlife and flora on the island and in the dining places.

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2. February 2010 02:39
by Rene Pallesen
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Junior

2. February 2010 02:39 by Rene Pallesen | 0 Comments

baby


We (Kim that is) are now almost half way through the pregnancy.

Last week we went to another ultrasound scan to check if everything is on track and to count the number of fingers and toes. Both baby and mum is fine so far. And how is daddy you ask? He is worried how he is going to handle being a dad...such a big responsibility and worried that he will be a lousy dad.


Click here for more photos

We now also know the sex of the baby...and it is going to be a BOY and is still due in mid-June!!! He has already started kicking according to Kim, so he may be an active one.


We were hoping for a girl because there is already more than enough boys in the family (Kayla started crying when she heard that is was a boy...she was hoping for someone to play with).

Click here for more photos

Anyway we can now start looking a good names for a boy.I suggested to Kim that we would start an auction on eBay where the winner would get the naming rights...Kim said NOOOO!!! So there goes my retirement plans and all the millions!


For anyone who is planning ahead and start buying stuff for the boy...check with Kim or myself first with regards to what we need (Sizes, Colours and brands).


Rules for toys:


1) No dolls or pink fluffy stuff....it is a boy for christ sake!
2) Climbing harness and shoes are perfect around year 4
3) A pair of skis at age 6
4) First Ice axe and crampons at age 10
5) Toys that required assembling and dis-assembling by the kid is perfect
6) Toys that can be assembled in more than one way is perfect (ie. Lego)
7) Toys that are created with the intension of making noise are banned
8) And the most important: Don't buy a toy unless you can explain to me what valuable lesson you hope the kid will learn from using that toy.



2. February 2010 01:45
by Rene Pallesen
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Critters

2. February 2010 01:45 by Rene Pallesen | 0 Comments

critters


It is common for Australian households to get a number of critters (mainly insects) into their houses during the summertime.

This may range from anything as harmless as flies to more serious things such as spiders. The worst of the spiders is probably the Funnel Webs although they are quite rare and I've never seen one inside.

The more scary but relatively harmless ones are the Huntsman spiders. These can get huge (the size of a dinner plate) and they are quite common inside. We get them inside probably 2-3 times a year and they always scare the #$@#$@ out of us!

The one picture below was inside the shower cabin and scared Kim.

Huntsman Spider

We also get smaller spiders inside...one of these is the Whitetail. It is a smaller spider but they can give a nasty bite that can get infected (but it is very rare for anyone to get bitten). I notice a lot of them outside when I'm watering the grass. I still haven't decided whether it is a problem I need to deal with as they also help controlling other insects.

We also get a lot of lot of other critter such as grasshoppers and caterpillars in the garden. Most of the insects I don't mind...the more biodiversity the more indication of a healthy micro ecosystem...if I could just get rid of the mosquitoes and the fruit flies.

Grashopper A fly

Whitetail spider

Caterpillar




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17. November 2008 12:40
by Rene Pallesen
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Wedding

17. November 2008 12:40 by Rene Pallesen | 0 Comments

wedding


On Sunday the 16th November 2008 I got married to Kim. It was a fantastic day and thanks to family and friends joining us making this a very memorable day.


My day started out (Kims started much earlier) in the morning with my Best Man (Andy) as well as a number of other friends coming over to my house picking up trays, organising ribbons on cars and picking up supplies for the wedding ceremony.

Kim had earlier in the morning left the house to go to her dads place to get dressed and have hair and makeup done.

Once we got the call saying that she was ready we drove over to her dads place and on the way there we were stopped by the police who insisted on breath testing us...sorry guys you were out too early, we hadn't started drinking yet.

At Kims place I had to bribe my way in through the door before they would let me in...all part of the tradition.

Click here to see more photos

Once I was let in my friends carried the trays of fruit, wine and noodles upstairs and this was the first time I saw Kim looking absolutely gorgeous in her wedding dress.
We then started the Tea Ceremony where we first had to pay respect to the elders by burning incense and then serve tea to the parents. In return they would then present us with red envelopes containing money and Kim's dad also gave Kim an old bracelet and ring that used to belong to her mum.

Click here to see more photos

After the Tea ceremony I drove down to La Perouse where the wedding ceremony was going to take place. We were a bit early so they were still getting ready. The wind was really strong so the garden arch needed wires to stay in place etc.

Once all the guests has arrived (around 40-50) Kim arrived in Nancys car with her bridesmaid (Natalie) and the ceremony could begin.

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Kim and I had decided and written most of the ceremony ourselves and the celebrant presented it beautifully (and very loud).

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After the ceremony we had some drinks and snacks with out guests and then took pictures for the next couple of hours around La Perouse and Centenial Park.

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Later in the afternoon we went back to our house to relax and freshen up for an hour until we then went to the Reception.

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We had invited 80 guests and they all arrived (more or less). People were greated out the front where they were served canabes and drinks and there was a pianist playing a piano.

People were then seated and once everyone were at the tables the bridal party was introduced.

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After the entrees My dad and Andy held their speeches (both very good and unfortunately mostly true) and after the main courses it was the turn of KC and myself.

To everyones surprise we had arranged entertainment during the evening in the form of some drummers. Everyone was given a drum and had to participate in the drumming.

Click here to see more photos

This also involved us dancing as part of the entertainment.

This was eventually followed by us cutting the wedding cake (a tower of cupcakes) a then dance the bridal walz.


Click here to see more photos

Click here to see more photos

Kim had changed to a more practical dress for the bridal walz and she looked absolutely stunning in it. Because I'd been sunburnt during the day my face almost matched the dress.


Clieck here to see more photos

15. November 2008 12:26
by Rene Pallesen
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Moved into the new house

15. November 2008 12:26 by Rene Pallesen | 0 Comments

moved into the new house


End of October we moved settled and moved into the new house. Not without a bit of of drama as the previous owner wasn't out of the house at settlement...but by the end of the day she was fortunately gone.

She was living there with three little boys (terrorists), so there was a number of smaller things that had been neglected and really needed some attention and there were a number of flaws around the place that needed fixing (it seems that the solution to every problem for the previous owners was silicone glue).

Most of this is under control now thanks to my dad helping out while here for the wedding (see next posting). Both Kim and I have now moved all our things and I've put kim in charge of selecting what colours she would like the walls to be downstairs before we go out and buy furniture.

We also need to get new lights downstairs as the ones there heat up and switch themselves off (cheap crap) so I may just as well do the ceiling now that I am at it.

15. November 2008 02:35
by Rene Pallesen
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My Dad in Sydney

15. November 2008 02:35 by Rene Pallesen | 0 Comments

my dad in sydney


My dad was in Sydney for our wedding and arrived on the 5th November just in time for us to also celebrate his birthday (We took him to his favourite steak house to get his favourite T-bone steak).

It was great to have him here for the wedding as it would have been empty to not have any family members from my side at the wedding. It was also really sad that my mum couldn't come.

We had just moved into the house week before so everything was still messy and there was a lot of things that needed fixing on the house. My dad was really helpful helping me out with a lot of the thing I'd never done before such as replacing tiles in the bathroom. He also changed the locks, fixed lights, painted walls, fixed doors, leaking taps etc.

It gave us something to do together which was great for bonding. I just wish he'd been there a bit longer...but maybe I can convince him to come back to help me build a pergola.

We also managed to do a bit of sightseeing around Sydney and it was great that he got a chance to meet Kims family.



The wedding was something different for him and I think that he was pretty frustrated that he didn't know what the asian customs were (not a typical Danish wedding).

He did give a really good speech at the wedding and I'm sorry to say that everything he said is true (although not everything was accurate).

23. September 2008 08:51
by Rene Pallesen
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Climbing Barrenjoey

23. September 2008 08:51 by Rene Pallesen | 0 Comments

climbing barrenjoey


This weekend we went up to Barrenjoey...a beautiful day. It was 31 degrees in Sydney but this time of the year the rocks here are mostly in the shade all day and there was a nice sea breeze running through the area.

We started with a couple of nice warm-ups and then moved onto one of my test pieces "Pillar of Mordor (19)". It is thin and sustained and really not very well protected so I have always back off leading it. Both Phil and I did lead it although not completely clean.

After this we did "Mescalito (19)" which is one of my favourite climbs there. Phil placed a cam in one of the breaks and it fell out and dropped down to the next bolt...fortunately he carried another cam to put in the break and eventually got up to the next bolt and through the climb.

The day was almost over and I had to go to the airport but Phil had his eyes on this climb "...Cab Sav (19)". The bottom bit of the climb is all protected by cams and the top bit is really thin and pumpy. Phil got up past the natural gear and clipped the first bolt. He then moved on and was struggling when clipping the second bolt but eventually got it. He then moved to the thirt and last bolt on the climb and as he moved up his foot caught the quickdraw and without him noticing the boltplate came off the bolt (He had clipped the botlplate upside down). He kept climbing up and got up to the third bolt, but because the previous bolt had fallen off it would have been a ground fall if he had fallen off. Phil was really struggling clipping it but we were so relieved on the ground once he did.

That was a really close one and it is the second time I've seen someone clip those types of plates wrong...bloody dangerous.

17. September 2008 02:42
by Rene Pallesen
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Yeeeaaahhh - Bought a house

17. September 2008 02:42 by Rene Pallesen | 0 Comments

Bought a house


We have bought a house now. We have signed the contract from our part and paid the deposit and our solicitor has received the signed contract from the Vendor. The property has now finally been pulled off the market by the real estate agent (that idiot) and we are looking at moving into the new place in mid/late October (before 24th October). Now we just need to go through all the mortgage application documents which if anything like last time I applied for a home load will be a lot of bureaucracy filling out triplicates, getting copies certified by rocket scientists (whom you have known for at least 40 years and who have worked in the industry since the Apollo program).


The Lounge Room...we'll paint the walls

This will be perfect as it means that Kim and I will have something to live in after the wedding (The current apartment is not really suitable and I would like Kim to feel like it is her home as well).The place is in Botany in the Eastern Suburbs and it is very close to Kim's family (about a 200 meter walk to one of her sisters and 5 minutes drive from her dad). And more importantly it is reasonably close to the city (10km) and away from the flight path of the airport.


We don't have much furniture so the place will be a bit empty in the beginning until we get the essentials. Kims sister has already donated us a dining table but we need to get items such as a bed and a washing machine immediately and then also items such as a sofa, entertainment unit etc.


It is a terrace house and has got the potential to do some really nice things to it. It is spacious on the inside and has got a small backyard that doesn't require too much maintenance. There is a bit of painting and maintenance that needs to be done immediately to the outdoor areas but nothing that cannot be managed. I am also sure that Kim would like have some painting done internally. My dad will arrive just after we have moved in so I am sure he won't get bored while here.


The floor plan

This Torrens title oversized terrace offers an ease of living combined with great design features spread over three very generous levels. Be immediately impressed by the flawless presentation and the impeccable renovation of this striking tri-level terrace. Enjoying an elevated position.
A handy convenient setting with ample street parking. Generous living with separate formal and casual areas. Tranquil north facing backyard and outdoor entertaining. Modern kitchen with breakfast bar stainless steel appliances. Upstairs bedrooms with built-ins, two with private balconies. Well appointed for care free modern living. Intelligently designed to maximise space and light. Dressed in fresh contemporary tones and polished floors
Automatic garage for two cars with internal access. Easy walk to local parks, schools, shops and transport


If you read the score further down in this blog, then you will know that the score now is 4 out of 5...just the wedding to complete to get 5 big events done within the same 6 months timeframe.


26. August 2008 02:03
by Rene Pallesen
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Climbing at Berowra

26. August 2008 02:03 by Rene Pallesen | 0 Comments

climbing at berowra


This weekend we went climbing up at Berowra (northern part of Sydney). It has been raining a lot and been very cold lately, but this day was sunny and very pleasant so no need for the down jacket and the gloved that I had brought with me.

Andy had just bought a new HD video camera and was keen to try it out and he got some really good footage og me climbing as well as Phil falling. Click here to see video


I actually had a really bad day climbing. I think work is stressing me out at the moment and one one of the first few climbs I freaked out when I got to a section with only slopers as hand holds (if you see the video then it was at the section where Phil shouts "YES!"). I was pretty upset when it happened and I was unable to get back into the right headspace.

The rest of the afternoon I was doing top ropes but had blown my strength and self esteem.




7. August 2008 07:10
by Rene Pallesen
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Brisbane

7. August 2008 07:10 by Rene Pallesen | 0 Comments

brisbane


Last week I was in Brisbane for some SharePoint training for the company. It was four days of intensive training but it was worth it and it was nice going up north where it is a bit warmer than here in Sydney at the moment.

I flew up there Tuesday morning leaving home at 5am to catch a 6am flight. It was the morning after my Birthday so Kim and I decided to just have a quiet evening and then celebrate some other time (Kim is going to take me to a nice restaurant).

Brisbane Bridge

I found a couple of good restaurants in Brisbane and one night I had Moreton Bay Bugs (Look like a giant cockroach). I also went for a walk to Kangaroo Point which is a big climbing area along the river in Brisbane. It is all lit up and actually looks like good climbing. I was surprised to find people climbing at night and also surprised to find that almost everyone was toproping rather than lead climbing (Everything is nicely bolted so there really is no excuse).

4. August 2008 05:00
by Rene Pallesen
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Skiing - Snowy Mountains

4. August 2008 05:00 by Rene Pallesen | 0 Comments

skiing snowy mountains


This year we again went skiing on the weekend closest to my birthday. We tried to get the same house as we did last year, but unfortunately it was already booked so we had to settle for an apartment. This did mean that we only had two bedrooms instead of three so it was only Soeren and Nui (and Freja) and Kim and I staying there. Kims ex-colleague Mark had to settle with staying at a caravan park.

The first day Soeren and I drove up to Perisher in my new car (first long trip in it) while the girls did their own thing. When we got back late afternoon after a whole day of skiing they had organised all the ingredients for a nice BBQ and marinated all the meat…yummy. Mark came over for dinner with Daniel and we had a nice evening with a couple of bottles of wine.

Next morning we got a late start (it took the other guys a bit of time to get ready) and we went to hire some additional gear for the girls to go skiing as well. This time we went to Thredbo which is much better in terms of variation of the runs and also the length. The longest run there is 3.7 kilometers. The girls took an instructor class (I think it is better if Kim gets an instructor by herself next time as she will get more attention).

Thredbo

It was a fairly short skiing day as we finished at three and then went on our way to the 5+ hour drive back to Sydney. Next year I think I'll take a lesson as well...I am getting pretty good at it now, but just need a few pointers to get even better especially at black runs and moguls.

21. July 2008 07:45
by Rene Pallesen
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New Car

21. July 2008 07:45 by Rene Pallesen | 0 Comments

new car


About two months ago a crashed and wrote off my old car...pretty silly but what can you do. Fortunately it was old and was already starting to cause problems and cost me a lot in repairs. Kim had already hinting that maybe it was time to get a new car and that the car was trying to tell me something.
The car was 11 years, the engine was leaking every fluid imaginable and the gearbox was slipping and there was rust developing so the timing to get a new car was pretty good.

The insurance paid me a good price for the old car...a lot more than I would have received if I had used it as a tradein to buy a new one.

After chasing around the city for a second hand car...amongst which there were some pretty dodgy deals the choice came down to either buy an 6 months old ex-rental or a new one. There was a $4000 difference and by the end of the day the decision came down to us needing that money once we buy a property so I decided to get the ex-rental. It is a nice blueish gray (Aztec Blue) Toyota Corolla. It will have its first test run this weekend when we go down to the snow in it.

My new car


Kim and I could probably have gotten by with just one car, but hers is too small to fit golf gear, ski & climbing gear etc. into and the new car is harder for her to drive because of the size...so for now we'll have two cars.


The score so far is:

Kim new job: Done
Rene new job: Done
New car: Done
Wedding: Pending
House: Pending


3 out of 5 aint bad

15. July 2008 12:17
by Rene Pallesen
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My Mums hardship

15. July 2008 12:17 by Rene Pallesen | 0 Comments

my mum moving out


Some years back my mum had a stroke while my parents were traveling in Thailand. This left totally paralysed in the left side of her body and she has been bound to a wheelchair ever since.

The stroke was most likely caused by heavy smoking and drinking and in general an unhealthy lifestyle.

This all happened a few years after my parents retired and were planning to spend most of the winters traveling in warmer countries. They have always been traveling a lot and never liked the winters in Denmark.
The realisation after the stroke for my parents was that suddenly those dreams were burst and that my mum would need constant care. My dad negotiated with the council that they would look after her one week a month which left my dad with some time to realise some of his dreams and at leaft do some traveling and at the same time provide some relief from looking after mum. It has been a hard blow to my mum and it is still very hard for her to accept that she will be bound to a wheelchair and dependent on other people for simple tasks such as going to the toilet, washing and getting dressed.


My mum some time ago discovered that some of the traveling my dad had done hadn't taken place alone but with an old female school friend (How intimate they were/are I don't know and don't care) but obviously my mum got very hurt and set the ultimatum that either he stops seeing her or she moves out. My dad said that he didn't want to stop seeing her and that he would still keep looking after my mum except for that one week every month.


It has now come to the point where my mum has found an apartment in a care facility and it going to move there this month. I am sure that it hurts a lot for her to move out.

Another blow has been that I am getting married in a few months time and that it is not possible for her to attend my wedding but that my dad is. It will be really hard for her on the day itself and I wish there was something I could do to make it easier for her or somehow allow her to attend.


So how do I feel about this? I am disappointed, angry and understanding at the same time. I am angry at my mum because she insisted smoking and drinking the way she did and tat this caused a stroke.

I am angry at my dad that he's found someone else and that is causing my mum to move out...she is the one totally loosing out. I am disappointed that their marriage and thereby also my family is breaking up.

I also understand why my dad has been longing for some company on different level and at the same time I also understand why my mum is so hurt about it. I am hurt because I know that my mum needs some support but that I am so far away but at the same time my life is here and I am about to get married here.I just hope that she understands that my happiness is dependent on me staying here. Especially since the stupid danish immigration laws will prevent me from moving back to Denmark with my future wife.


I am also hurt because my parents during the last decade has been through so much hardship first with my brother, then with the stroke and now with all this.


This is certainly a year of change...