Last night Kim and I went to the show Velvet at the Sydney Opera House.

It was a combination of circus, burlesque and boogie nights (70's music) in one show.




The show had great music with Marcia Hines and Brendan Maclean and the performers were great. I think everyones favourite was the guy with the hula hoops.

I don't know for sure which ones are Claus and which ones are Rene.

This post is mostly about Claus when he was at his top as one of Denmarks top tennis players.

I have kept scans of all the newspaper clippings from when he was winning a lot of tournaments.





























































In the mid 90's he started to get pretty sick and although he still tried to play tennis it was never at the same level again. Eventually he more or less gave up. His illness took to great a hold of him. These are some of the 'darkest' photos I have of him while he was struggling with his schizophrenia and were taken shortly before I moved to Australia.





He lost contact with most of his friends and was very dependent on my mum and dad as well as other support programs in place.







I prefer to remember him as he was before he passed away.


















This poem reminds me of him.

The morning after I killed myself, I woke up.

I made myself breakfast in bed. I added salt and pepper to my eggs and used my toast for a cheese and bacon sandwich. I squeezed a grapefruit into a juice glass. I scraped the ashes from the frying pan and rinsed the butter off the counter. I washed the dishes and folded the towels.
The morning after I killed myself, I fell in love. Not with the boy down the street or the middle school principal. Not with the everyday jogger or the grocer who always left the avocados out of the bag. I fell in love with my mother and the way she sat on the floor of my room holding each rock from my collection in her palms until they grew dark with sweat. I fell in love with my father down at the river as he placed my note into a bottle and sent it into the current. With my brother who once believed in unicorns but who now sat in his desk at school trying desperately to believe I still existed.

The morning after I killed myself, I walked the dog. I watched the way her tail twitched when a bird flew by or how her pace quickened at the sight of a cat. I saw the empty space in her eyes when she reached a stick and turned around to greet me so we could play catch but saw nothing but sky in my place. I stood by as strangers stroked her muzzle and she wilted beneath their touch like she did once for mine.

The morning after I killed myself, I went back to the neighbors’ yard where I left my footprints in concrete as a two year old and examined how they were already fading. I picked a few daylilies and pulled a few weeds and watched the elderly woman through her window as she read the paper with the news of my death. I saw her husband spit tobacco into the kitchen sink and bring her her daily medication.

The morning after I killed myself, I watched the sun come up. Each orange tree opened like a hand and the kid down the street pointed out a single red cloud to his mother.

The morning after I killed myself, I went back to that body in the morgue and tried to talk some sense into her. I told her about the avocados and the stepping stones, the river and her parents. I told her about the sunsets and the dog and the beach.

The morning after I killed myself, I tried to unkill myself, but couldn’t finish what I started.

—Meggie Royer

Here are some more photos from my childhood in no particular order.

The first ones from a New Years eve where we got a bit silly with the hats. These were taken at a New Years even in Kenya and before my brother got really sick, so probably around 1989/90.



And here is Claus.



And my mum.




I was really good at shooting when I was a kid and won lots of championships. This photo is one of the few things I have from that time.


This is Claus and I with our dog.



Not sure which ones of these is Claus and which is me.




















This was taken just christmas day in the back yard of my grandma's (Mormor) house. We got the skis as a christmas present. All the fields behind her house belonged to my mothers brother Flemming.



I think this may be my brother. For the first time I've noticed the photo in the background. It looks like this may be a photo of my mum with her two sisters and brother and what could be her dad Raimer in the middle.















This would most likely be the new years eve where we were trapped by the snow 1978/79. We were supposed to have celebrated with the family but couldn't even get out of the house. Delicious with a glass of milk and a pie.






We didn't have a lawn in the back yard. Instead we had pebbles...lots of fun shoveling them.







This I think is a christmas eve dinner at my grandmas (mormor) place. My mum on the left and my uncle Flemming in the middle. Not sure who the person standing up in. It could be my grandmas brother. Possibly from around 1976/77


I think it is my great grandpa (Raimer) in the middle row number two from the left. The title of the photo says that it is Christoffer (??) in the top left corner. Looking at the age of the boys this would have been taken in the 1920's.


Claus dancing aeound the christmas tree and my mum and grandma (Bedstemor/Farmor).


From left to Right. My grandma (On my dads side/Bedstemor/farmor), Knud Aage (My uncle/dads brother), My mum (in the foreground), My grandad (in the background), Irene (my auntie/dads sister), Grete and I assume the baby is Vinnie which means that it is likely that my mum was pregnant with Claus (born in July).






















This was taken at my grandparents place and after my brother got sick. He was really suffering at this point.






This is one of the happiest family photos I have and the only one I have a print of.



Going for a walk at Marielyst with Lott and Willy some of our german friends. Claus in the foreground and my dad on the right. I think you can just spot me in yellow pants in the background.



I think this is at Lotte and Willy's summer house.






Not sure if this is Claus or myself being babtised. It is my grand mother being god mother.











This was taken outside our summer house in Marielyst.



My brother number 2 from the top right on his school photo.



Claus at daycare number 4 from the top left.



Me at day care top left.

Here is some more old photos of my mum. This time with here brother and sisters.

This first one if probably one of the oldest. You can tell that the photo was shot in black and white and that the negative was later coloured (badly). It would be my mum in the middle with her two sisters Eli (the oldest on the right) and Yrsa.




This is my mum in the middle with what I assume is cousins.





I think it is my grandmother (Karen) holding my mum.


Here is the same as the first photo, but this time without the colour.



My mum and her sisters playing in the courtyard of their farm


My mum with her older sisters.


Eli, Yrsa, Sonja and Flemming Kragh.


Having her photo taken as a little girl.


Upset about having her photo taken?
























My mum with her younger brother Flemming.


As a liitle girl


My mum in school.





From left to right...Eli, Yrsa my mum (Sonja) and Flemming.


As a young girls/woman...possibly from her Konfirmation.



My mum as a girl scout (no 4 from the left).


It is Flemming in the middle and my mum on the right.

When I was a kid we would every summer travel to Southern Europe with our caravan.

Usually travelling through Swizerland or Austria ending up in Italy (Either Lido di Jesolo or the Italian Riviera). Underway we would visit old friends of my mum and dad from the time they were working in Italy.

Here are some photos from that time.









I just noticed the burn scar on my arm on the above photo. I think this is one of the few childhood photos where you can really see it.




















This was out caravan while travelling.








This is our caravan with the tent up in the middle.

This weekend we took the kids for a walk with some friends from Maroubra to Lurline Bay.

It is a nice little pleasant walk that is easy for the kids.




They loved jumping between the boulders.




...and exploring the small rock pools.







Because of the recent storms the beach was full of Blue bottles, so no playing in the sand this time around.





They are nasty little creatures that will sting you badly if you touch them.




This surfer was being very careful in his bare feet.

Earlier this month it was Lucas birthday.

We didn't have a kids party for him, but we did celebrate with the family.







We gave him a new bike for his birthday...he was stunned and didn't know what to think of it, but he loves riding it now.

Last weekend there was a Lego exhibition in the city.

We caught the train in to St James station and walked from there.





It was a fairly small exhibition with my favourite being the pirate ship with all the details of the lower decks.












There was also some Ninjago and Star wars.










And a lot of other pieces.

Rather than keeping all the kids artwork I instead take photos of it.

Here is some of the latest additions.

Model: Taylia Jordan
HMUA: Donna Kalasho
Lighting and Sets: Studio 1A Sydney
Photo: Rene Pallesen




Hard to believe that this is the same girl/model who during the last shoot was in this extravagant hair and makeup. I almost didn't recognise her.

First of many from the photoshoot I did two weeks ago.

Model: Michaela Baranov
HMUA: Roxanne Cahill
Lighting and Sets: Studio 1A Sydney
Photo: Rene Pallesen

Kim and I found a couple of hours to play 9 holes of golf on a short (mostly) par 3 course after not playing for 5 years.

It was nice getting out again after that long time even though it was very windy and freezing.

Last weekend we went to Cabramatta to have my car services and also make a bit of a day trip out of it.

Kim had a haircut while the boys has ice cream.



She also went past the show shop where they sell boots in her size.




Aiden got a new Lightning Mcqueen pyjamas that he was very excited about.




Lots of street food about to make you hungry.










So Lunch we had...





All very tiring.

One of the last days when the kids were still a bit sick we though we'd get them out of the house and go to Darling Harbour.

Aiden wanted to go on the tea-cups even though he was still suffering a bit.

A few weeks ago I was in Melbourne for work.

On the way back Kim called and said that Aiden had a really high fever (41+ degrees) and that she was going to get him to the hospital because she was afraid that he'd collapse like he did last time.

I jumped on an earlier flight and went straight to the hospital and spent the night with him. He was really miserable and it took 5 days (fortunately not in the hospital) before we got the fever under control.



After that Lucas got sick and then Kim as well....what a week!!

Here is some photos that I have taken from various places including work.

They don't really belong anywhere but it is a pity to not share them.

One day walking from the train station I walked past this pair of sandals under a tree. I don't know the story behind them or the reason why one was taped up.

Did the owner climb the tree and then vanish? Did he (I assume it was a male) walk away bare feet? Where did he come from (Bata is a big brand in Africa and India)?



This next one was taken on the train. I was bored and notices this girl with a small swallow tattoo.




One day I was at Warriewood for a work meeting a dropped past Narrabeen beach (where I used to live). It was a beautiful day to have a play with the panorama function on the iphone.



Here is another panorama. This time from Town hall in Sydney.

We had our annual conference there and couldn't resist getting some photos of the beautiful architecture with my phone.





A couple of weeks ago I went to Melbourne for work. On the way we flew over the Snowy Mountains and I could see the snow there.




Here is another one from work that I took ages ago. When we all moved to the Campus from the city we were invited to hand our own avatar on this wall (mine is hanging somewhere in the top left hand corner).




Here is a photo from the campus itself. It is a cool place to work. Just a pity it is so far from the city.

It is not often that I see Aiden engaged in painting at daycare (he used to be reluctant to get dirty, but now he loves it).

Here he is working on one of his masterpieces.

Lucas loves reading books...he can sit and look at books for hours if he is allowed.

One day at daycare all the other kids were playing loudly in another room and I found him in a separate room sitting quietly sitting in a small cardboard box reading by himself.

The kids are really excited whenever they get something with Thomas (the tank engine) on it.

Latest is Aiden's new Bath rope. He was so excited that he asked me to take a photo.