Last night Kim and I went to the show Velvet at the Sydney Opera House.

It was a combination of circus, burlesque and boogie nights (70's music) in one show.




The show had great music with Marcia Hines and Brendan Maclean and the performers were great. I think everyones favourite was the guy with the hula hoops.

I don't know for sure which ones are Claus and which ones are Rene.

This post is mostly about Claus when he was at his top as one of Denmarks top tennis players.

I have kept scans of all the newspaper clippings from when he was winning a lot of tournaments.





























































In the mid 90's he started to get pretty sick and although he still tried to play tennis it was never at the same level again. Eventually he more or less gave up. His illness took to great a hold of him. These are some of the 'darkest' photos I have of him while he was struggling with his schizophrenia and were taken shortly before I moved to Australia.





He lost contact with most of his friends and was very dependent on my mum and dad as well as other support programs in place.







I prefer to remember him as he was before he passed away.


















This poem reminds me of him.

The morning after I killed myself, I woke up.

I made myself breakfast in bed. I added salt and pepper to my eggs and used my toast for a cheese and bacon sandwich. I squeezed a grapefruit into a juice glass. I scraped the ashes from the frying pan and rinsed the butter off the counter. I washed the dishes and folded the towels.
The morning after I killed myself, I fell in love. Not with the boy down the street or the middle school principal. Not with the everyday jogger or the grocer who always left the avocados out of the bag. I fell in love with my mother and the way she sat on the floor of my room holding each rock from my collection in her palms until they grew dark with sweat. I fell in love with my father down at the river as he placed my note into a bottle and sent it into the current. With my brother who once believed in unicorns but who now sat in his desk at school trying desperately to believe I still existed.

The morning after I killed myself, I walked the dog. I watched the way her tail twitched when a bird flew by or how her pace quickened at the sight of a cat. I saw the empty space in her eyes when she reached a stick and turned around to greet me so we could play catch but saw nothing but sky in my place. I stood by as strangers stroked her muzzle and she wilted beneath their touch like she did once for mine.

The morning after I killed myself, I went back to the neighbors’ yard where I left my footprints in concrete as a two year old and examined how they were already fading. I picked a few daylilies and pulled a few weeds and watched the elderly woman through her window as she read the paper with the news of my death. I saw her husband spit tobacco into the kitchen sink and bring her her daily medication.

The morning after I killed myself, I watched the sun come up. Each orange tree opened like a hand and the kid down the street pointed out a single red cloud to his mother.

The morning after I killed myself, I went back to that body in the morgue and tried to talk some sense into her. I told her about the avocados and the stepping stones, the river and her parents. I told her about the sunsets and the dog and the beach.

The morning after I killed myself, I tried to unkill myself, but couldn’t finish what I started.

—Meggie Royer

Here are some more photos from my childhood in no particular order.

The first ones from a New Years eve where we got a bit silly with the hats. These were taken at a New Years even in Kenya and before my brother got really sick, so probably around 1989/90.



And here is Claus.



And my mum.




I was really good at shooting when I was a kid and won lots of championships. This photo is one of the few things I have from that time.


This is Claus and I with our dog.



Not sure which ones of these is Claus and which is me.




















This was taken just christmas day in the back yard of my grandma's (Mormor) house. We got the skis as a christmas present. All the fields behind her house belonged to my mothers brother Flemming.



I think this may be my brother. For the first time I've noticed the photo in the background. It looks like this may be a photo of my mum with her two sisters and brother and what could be her dad Raimer in the middle.















This would most likely be the new years eve where we were trapped by the snow 1978/79. We were supposed to have celebrated with the family but couldn't even get out of the house. Delicious with a glass of milk and a pie.






We didn't have a lawn in the back yard. Instead we had pebbles...lots of fun shoveling them.







This I think is a christmas eve dinner at my grandmas (mormor) place. My mum on the left and my uncle Flemming in the middle. Not sure who the person standing up in. It could be my grandmas brother. Possibly from around 1976/77


I think it is my great grandpa (Raimer) in the middle row number two from the left. The title of the photo says that it is Christoffer (??) in the top left corner. Looking at the age of the boys this would have been taken in the 1920's.


Claus dancing aeound the christmas tree and my mum and grandma (Bedstemor/Farmor).


From left to Right. My grandma (On my dads side/Bedstemor/farmor), Knud Aage (My uncle/dads brother), My mum (in the foreground), My grandad (in the background), Irene (my auntie/dads sister), Grete and I assume the baby is Vinnie which means that it is likely that my mum was pregnant with Claus (born in July).






















This was taken at my grandparents place and after my brother got sick. He was really suffering at this point.






This is one of the happiest family photos I have and the only one I have a print of.



Going for a walk at Marielyst with Lott and Willy some of our german friends. Claus in the foreground and my dad on the right. I think you can just spot me in yellow pants in the background.



I think this is at Lotte and Willy's summer house.






Not sure if this is Claus or myself being babtised. It is my grand mother being god mother.











This was taken outside our summer house in Marielyst.



My brother number 2 from the top right on his school photo.



Claus at daycare number 4 from the top left.



Me at day care top left.

Here is some more old photos of my mum. This time with here brother and sisters.

This first one if probably one of the oldest. You can tell that the photo was shot in black and white and that the negative was later coloured (badly). It would be my mum in the middle with her two sisters Eli (the oldest on the right) and Yrsa.




This is my mum in the middle with what I assume is cousins.





I think it is my grandmother (Karen) holding my mum.


Here is the same as the first photo, but this time without the colour.



My mum and her sisters playing in the courtyard of their farm


My mum with her older sisters.


Eli, Yrsa, Sonja and Flemming Kragh.


Having her photo taken as a little girl.


Upset about having her photo taken?
























My mum with her younger brother Flemming.


As a liitle girl


My mum in school.





From left to right...Eli, Yrsa my mum (Sonja) and Flemming.


As a young girls/woman...possibly from her Konfirmation.



My mum as a girl scout (no 4 from the left).


It is Flemming in the middle and my mum on the right.

When I was a kid we would every summer travel to Southern Europe with our caravan.

Usually travelling through Swizerland or Austria ending up in Italy (Either Lido di Jesolo or the Italian Riviera). Underway we would visit old friends of my mum and dad from the time they were working in Italy.

Here are some photos from that time.









I just noticed the burn scar on my arm on the above photo. I think this is one of the few childhood photos where you can really see it.




















This was out caravan while travelling.








This is our caravan with the tent up in the middle.

This weekend we took the kids for a walk with some friends from Maroubra to Lurline Bay.

It is a nice little pleasant walk that is easy for the kids.




They loved jumping between the boulders.




...and exploring the small rock pools.







Because of the recent storms the beach was full of Blue bottles, so no playing in the sand this time around.





They are nasty little creatures that will sting you badly if you touch them.




This surfer was being very careful in his bare feet.

Earlier this month it was Lucas birthday.

We didn't have a kids party for him, but we did celebrate with the family.







We gave him a new bike for his birthday...he was stunned and didn't know what to think of it, but he loves riding it now.

Last weekend there was a Lego exhibition in the city.

We caught the train in to St James station and walked from there.





It was a fairly small exhibition with my favourite being the pirate ship with all the details of the lower decks.












There was also some Ninjago and Star wars.










And a lot of other pieces.

Rather than keeping all the kids artwork I instead take photos of it.

Here is some of the latest additions.

The first Christmas for Lucas is approaching. This also means that he is being subjected to all kinds of Christmas rituals such as posing for his Dads Christmas photos.

This year we celebrated Kims Dads birthday with a big lunch for the whole family where everyone brough along something to eat.

Afterwards we did some family photos with Kim and all the grans children as well as my Dad and his two grand children Aiden and Lucas.

I finally had to bite the bullet and get my eyes checked out for glasses.

I had started developing a headache if sitting in front of the computer or reading for extended periods of time



So I now have some reading glasses that I can use...makes me feel old.

Needless to say that our lives currently revolve around looking after Lucas and Aiden.

This Saturday I took Aiden swimming in the morning and I must say that he is getting more and more confident in the water. We reached another milestone with him being happy to just swim around (in circles mostly) wearing his floaties without holding onto me.

In the afternoon it was really hot...36 degrees in the shade, so we decided to let him have some more waterfun at home in the inflatable pool.

This weekend we bought some playdough for Aiden to play with.

Initially he wasn't sure what to do with it, but after a while with a bit of guidance he started getting a bit more creative.

It is now the first of december and the Christmas shopping has started in the shopping centres.

The other day the mall has a big sale and with that sale they has different characters walk the floor...in this case a Teddy with a girlie Santa.

Aiden was very excited but a lille scared of the big teddy bear.

Last week Kim asked me to bring the camera an take some photos of Lucas on the bed.




He is now two and an half months old and is now able to smile and get excited when he sees you and when you talk to him.







He is still keeping mummy up at night although we think he is getting a bit better on that front.

This photo was actually taken more than 6 months ago, but going through some old photos I found it too good not to post.

I was setting up for a pregnancy shoot (then Kim was 4 months due) and Aiden was trying to assist me with the setup. He happened to sit down it the perfect spot and give me a pose that tells so much about his character at that time...sucking his fingers and everything.




...and by pure coincidence it happened that the photo was perfectly lit.

I took this photo a couple of months ago, but haven't come around to finishing it until now.

It is a photo of Lucas' foot in my hands.

I found this old photo of myself that my dad took of me when I was about 3 years old (I think).




Looking at Aiden today there is a strong resemblance in the facial features.



The photo was badly damaged and requires a fair bit of restoration, but at least I now have a digital copy of the photo.

Today it is Aidens Birthday....he is now 5 Months old (when you are less than 6 months old you get to have birthday every month).



He is a good/easy little boy. He is now able to keep his head up, but still unable to sit or roll around onto his tummy. He sleeps through the night and wakes up around 7.30 to get a feed. On weekends he is happy to go back to sleep so his Mummy and Daddy can sleep in.


He is very quiet when in crowded places and likes to just sit and observe (Kims dad is saying that he has got that after me).

It has taken me a long time to get this photo done. I had to wait for him to keep his head up and even then it was pretty hard to get hime to look in the right direction.

I have now finished the second portrait in the series of the four elements...just Fire and Air left. This one is "Water". The yellow blob is a Weedy Sea Dragon.




...Really helping my Photoshop skills. Not sure if anyone else thinks these photos are cool...but they are cool to make and are different from what I'd otherwise be doing.

This weekend Kim and I went to see the musical Fame at Capitol theatre with a couple of friends Audrey and John.

Most of the cast was made up of dancers from “So you think you can dance” so there was a potential for a really good performance with some excellent dancing.


Our friends had organised a babysitter for the night and Aiden was being looked after by Kim’s dad and sister.

The performance was good (but not great). I think we were expecting more singing and dancing (It was a musical) and less dialogue. The second half of the play was a lot better than the first half with more dancing.

Unfortunately our friends missed this part as she was worried about their kid left alone with the babysitter (that is kinda the point of getting a babysitter) and left during the intermission.


At the end they got everyone in the audience up from their chairs for the famous "Fame" song.


Kim and I however had a good night out…and she looked smashing!

Lately I have been playing around with Photoshop a lot more going through different tutorials.

Main purpose is to enable me to manipulate photos and add a different dimension to these photos. I have especially been trying to create some interesting profile photos that I can use of facebook and the like.

The portraits don't necessarily mean anything...mainly created them to see if I could do something out of the ordinary.The plan is to see if I can make a series Earth - Water - Fire - Air following the four basic elements.


It was really hard to get the starting photo right in my studio. It is almost impossible to do a photo of one-self and have it in focus...eventually Kim had to step in a help me (which I am very grateful for). In total it took me about 2-3 hours from start (taking the photo) to the finished result.

Yesterday we went to the beach to have a coffee with a couple of friends. While Kim was catching up on all the gossip I went out to see if I could get some good photos of the surfers (The surf was pretty good that day).

On the weekend I had a bit of fun with Aiden. I bought a world map on email just so that I could take the following photos of him...







And this last photo I call "Is this where you grew up daddy??"




He is now 4 months old and still doesn't like being on his belly...so I had to be pretty quick with the setup.

Sunday night Kim and I was looking after Ethan and Kayla while Chong and KC went out for dinner.

Kims dad and Dylan popped over for a couple of hours (Kims dad wanted to see Aiden ;-)) and after dinner and after Aiden was asleep I set up the studio to take some portraits of the kids. Main purpose was to experiment a little to improve my photography skills...especially my study of shadows (It is easy to light, but harder to create meaningful shadows).

Lately I have been doing more photography using all my flashes with wireless triggers to get interesting angles and effects. A couple of days ago I bought a couple of pieces of fabric in different colours (blue and red) to use as backgrounds and the following photos are a result of Sunday nights photoshoot.












I used one flash camera right in a 60*60 softbox, Hair light behind camera left snooted. In retrospect I should have taken my 3rd flash and used this to light the coloured backdrops to create better seperation...the highlights above are done in Post processing.

I had a bit of fun on the weekend and spent a little time using photoshop doing something different for a self portrait. Just a bit of fun for a Facebook profile photo.


It took me about 5 minutes to take the photo and about 25-45 in photoshop to modify the image.




After taking the image I modified the background, de-saturated the colours, saturated the green colours, added the cat-eye contact lenses and extended the canine teeth slightly...done! Not perfect, but good enough for what I wanted to try and accomplish.

This week there was a big low pressure system of the coast of Tasmania resulting in 18 meter waves there. It was predicted that some of this swell would hit Sydney this weekend resulting in 3-4 meter waves on south facing beaches. This Saturday morning I went down to Maroubra to have a look...The waves weren't as big as I had expected, but there were lots of surfers there and I did manage to take a couple of reasonable photos (I may try again tomorrow).










I am sure that there were a lot of professional/semi professional surfers out there, but unfortunately I would not be able to recognise anyone. Some of the photos I took with my 28-200mm lens which is super sharp. I also took some with an old 500mm mirror lens...it is reasonable ok...but almost impossible to keep in focus.

Some people have said that Aiden looks like me (mostly) and some says that he looks more like Kim.

Here is a photo of Kim and I with Aiden as well as my mum holding me after I was born (I think):



I REST MY CASE!!!!!