This post is mostly about Claus when he was at his top as one of Denmarks top tennis players.

I have kept scans of all the newspaper clippings from when he was winning a lot of tournaments.





























































In the mid 90's he started to get pretty sick and although he still tried to play tennis it was never at the same level again. Eventually he more or less gave up. His illness took to great a hold of him. These are some of the 'darkest' photos I have of him while he was struggling with his schizophrenia and were taken shortly before I moved to Australia.





He lost contact with most of his friends and was very dependent on my mum and dad as well as other support programs in place.







I prefer to remember him as he was before he passed away.


















This poem reminds me of him.

The morning after I killed myself, I woke up.

I made myself breakfast in bed. I added salt and pepper to my eggs and used my toast for a cheese and bacon sandwich. I squeezed a grapefruit into a juice glass. I scraped the ashes from the frying pan and rinsed the butter off the counter. I washed the dishes and folded the towels.
The morning after I killed myself, I fell in love. Not with the boy down the street or the middle school principal. Not with the everyday jogger or the grocer who always left the avocados out of the bag. I fell in love with my mother and the way she sat on the floor of my room holding each rock from my collection in her palms until they grew dark with sweat. I fell in love with my father down at the river as he placed my note into a bottle and sent it into the current. With my brother who once believed in unicorns but who now sat in his desk at school trying desperately to believe I still existed.

The morning after I killed myself, I walked the dog. I watched the way her tail twitched when a bird flew by or how her pace quickened at the sight of a cat. I saw the empty space in her eyes when she reached a stick and turned around to greet me so we could play catch but saw nothing but sky in my place. I stood by as strangers stroked her muzzle and she wilted beneath their touch like she did once for mine.

The morning after I killed myself, I went back to the neighbors’ yard where I left my footprints in concrete as a two year old and examined how they were already fading. I picked a few daylilies and pulled a few weeds and watched the elderly woman through her window as she read the paper with the news of my death. I saw her husband spit tobacco into the kitchen sink and bring her her daily medication.

The morning after I killed myself, I watched the sun come up. Each orange tree opened like a hand and the kid down the street pointed out a single red cloud to his mother.

The morning after I killed myself, I went back to that body in the morgue and tried to talk some sense into her. I told her about the avocados and the stepping stones, the river and her parents. I told her about the sunsets and the dog and the beach.

The morning after I killed myself, I tried to unkill myself, but couldn’t finish what I started.

—Meggie Royer

Here are some more photos from my childhood in no particular order.

The first ones from a New Years eve where we got a bit silly with the hats. These were taken at a New Years even in Kenya and before my brother got really sick, so probably around 1989/90.



And here is Claus.



And my mum.




I was really good at shooting when I was a kid and won lots of championships. This photo is one of the few things I have from that time.


This is Claus and I with our dog.



Not sure which ones of these is Claus and which is me.




















This was taken just christmas day in the back yard of my grandma's (Mormor) house. We got the skis as a christmas present. All the fields behind her house belonged to my mothers brother Flemming.



I think this may be my brother. For the first time I've noticed the photo in the background. It looks like this may be a photo of my mum with her two sisters and brother and what could be her dad Raimer in the middle.















This would most likely be the new years eve where we were trapped by the snow 1978/79. We were supposed to have celebrated with the family but couldn't even get out of the house. Delicious with a glass of milk and a pie.






We didn't have a lawn in the back yard. Instead we had pebbles...lots of fun shoveling them.







This I think is a christmas eve dinner at my grandmas (mormor) place. My mum on the left and my uncle Flemming in the middle. Not sure who the person standing up in. It could be my grandmas brother. Possibly from around 1976/77


I think it is my great grandpa (Raimer) in the middle row number two from the left. The title of the photo says that it is Christoffer (??) in the top left corner. Looking at the age of the boys this would have been taken in the 1920's.


Claus dancing aeound the christmas tree and my mum and grandma (Bedstemor/Farmor).


From left to Right. My grandma (On my dads side/Bedstemor/farmor), Knud Aage (My uncle/dads brother), My mum (in the foreground), My grandad (in the background), Irene (my auntie/dads sister), Grete and I assume the baby is Vinnie which means that it is likely that my mum was pregnant with Claus (born in July).






















This was taken at my grandparents place and after my brother got sick. He was really suffering at this point.






This is one of the happiest family photos I have and the only one I have a print of.



Going for a walk at Marielyst with Lott and Willy some of our german friends. Claus in the foreground and my dad on the right. I think you can just spot me in yellow pants in the background.



I think this is at Lotte and Willy's summer house.






Not sure if this is Claus or myself being babtised. It is my grand mother being god mother.











This was taken outside our summer house in Marielyst.



My brother number 2 from the top right on his school photo.



Claus at daycare number 4 from the top left.



Me at day care top left.

Here is some more old photos of my mum. This time with here brother and sisters.

This first one if probably one of the oldest. You can tell that the photo was shot in black and white and that the negative was later coloured (badly). It would be my mum in the middle with her two sisters Eli (the oldest on the right) and Yrsa.




This is my mum in the middle with what I assume is cousins.





I think it is my grandmother (Karen) holding my mum.


Here is the same as the first photo, but this time without the colour.



My mum and her sisters playing in the courtyard of their farm


My mum with her older sisters.


Eli, Yrsa, Sonja and Flemming Kragh.


Having her photo taken as a little girl.


Upset about having her photo taken?
























My mum with her younger brother Flemming.


As a liitle girl


My mum in school.





From left to right...Eli, Yrsa my mum (Sonja) and Flemming.


As a young girls/woman...possibly from her Konfirmation.



My mum as a girl scout (no 4 from the left).


It is Flemming in the middle and my mum on the right.

This weekend we took the kids for a walk with some friends from Maroubra to Lurline Bay.

It is a nice little pleasant walk that is easy for the kids.




They loved jumping between the boulders.




...and exploring the small rock pools.







Because of the recent storms the beach was full of Blue bottles, so no playing in the sand this time around.





They are nasty little creatures that will sting you badly if you touch them.




This surfer was being very careful in his bare feet.

Earlier this month it was Lucas birthday.

We didn't have a kids party for him, but we did celebrate with the family.







We gave him a new bike for his birthday...he was stunned and didn't know what to think of it, but he loves riding it now.

When I was a kid we would every summer travel to Southern Europe with our caravan.

Usually travelling through Swizerland or Austria ending up in Italy (Either Lido di Jesolo or the Italian Riviera). Underway we would visit old friends of my mum and dad from the time they were working in Italy.

Here are some photos from that time.









I just noticed the burn scar on my arm on the above photo. I think this is one of the few childhood photos where you can really see it.




















This was out caravan while travelling.








This is our caravan with the tent up in the middle.

Last weekend there was a Lego exhibition in the city.

We caught the train in to St James station and walked from there.





It was a fairly small exhibition with my favourite being the pirate ship with all the details of the lower decks.












There was also some Ninjago and Star wars.










And a lot of other pieces.

This Sunday it was fathers day.

It was celebrated with a game of Bowling with the kids in the morning and then family dinner in the evening (with yummi chocolate cake).







This photo is the only family photo I have with the entire Kims family (including little Mia).

Rather than keeping all the kids artwork I instead take photos of it.

Here is some of the latest additions.

This weekend Kim and I joined a couple of friends at the opera house to see the show Anything Goes.

This is a great musical which I believe is based on a book and it was first shown on Broadway all the way back in 1934.

I love the old costumes from back...

Last weekend Kim and I went to see King Lear at the Sydney Opera House. Kim had managed to get cheap preview tickets on the third row from the stage which is pretty unheard of.



The play wasn't anything fancy in terms of stage production, costumes or anything (Actually some of the actors were wearing fairly modern denim jeans).

On the side of the stage they had positioned a drumkit and a girl was banging away all throughout the first half of the performance. I found this very distracting and annoying since I was already trying hard to concentrate on understanding the old Shakespearean English.

During the second half they moved the drumkit off the stage, so I must say that I actually started to enjoy the play a lot more.

Given that we got pretty cheap tickets I found the evening pretty good value, but I don't think I'd pay full price for this one.

Sunday I convinced Kim that we should go to the Beach. I wanted to try my underwater casing for my pocket camera in the waves to see if I could get some good photos. In 2000 I went to the World Press Photo exhibition and saw these great underwater photos from the surf and was inspired to see if I could re-create them.


Kim insisted that we picked up a beach shelter on the way there so that she would have some shade. We found on in K-Mart and then went on our way to the beach.

The first few minutes folding up the beach shelter was a disaster (It was one of those quick fold out ones where you just pull a string...junk!!) and eventually we just threw it all back in the bag deciding to return it on the way home (we'll get a pop-up one instead).


Taking the photos turned out to be a lot trickier than expected. It was fairly windy and the visibility wasn't great. Also the pocket camera tries to auto focus prior to taking the photo which was difficult with everything moving around constantly so most of the time the camera didn't take the photo.It was also quite hard to aim the camera while being battered around by the waves.








I did however manage to take these photos that turned out somewhat alright. I might try again one day when the conditions are better (and I've figured out how to lock the focus on the camera)

For the past three weeks my uncle and auntie (Eli & Henning) has been travelling in New Zealand with a tour group.

On the way home they did a 24 hour stopover with the group so do some quick sightseeing before continuing their journey.

They had a tightly packed program arriving late in the afternoon, out for a late dinner and then spend then morning next day on a tour around the city before heading back to the airport.

Kim and I managed to catch up with them in the evening for dinner at Nicks at King Street Wharf. Afterwards we went for a walk down to Circular Quay so that they could have a look at the Harbour bridge and the Opera House at night.



By the time we got back to the hotel it was midnight and they had to check out of their hotel early next morning.

We hope that they enjoyed the sightseeing the day after (it was a fairly warm day) and that they had a good journey back to Denmark. Apparently there is a lot of snow there currently so they were prepared for the fact that they would have to do a fair bit of digging to get to their car and into their house.

It is not very often that we have visiting family from Denmark so it is always a pleasure to see them.

This weekend I was cutting down the bouganvillae in the garden. Whenever I cut down some of the vegetation in the garden it is always interesting what insects I discover in the process. Because of the variety of plants there is always something new to discover. I try not to use pesticides in the garden itself...better to just let nature find a balance.

On this occation I discovered a large Garden spider and a Green Praying mantis (I have seen a Mantis before in the garden and they are great to have a pest control). Both are totally harmless.






This is what a website had to say about this Common Garden Spider:

"Now this is your classic common garden spider from Sydney. The Australian Museum page on garden orb weaving spiders tells me there is a second, almost identical species (edulis) but that that lives further inland. There must be hundreds of people each summer who can be seen jumping madly up and down in their gardens swiping at themselves just to be sure to get rid of this guy from their clothing after they've walked through a web. Although certainly large enough, this spider is reluctant to bite humans. "


Last week I did however see a redback spider on the other side of the house. Needless to say that I killed it before I got a chance to take a photo (They are extremely venoumous and the closest relative to a Black Widow). To be honest it is the first time I've seen one in the wild for more that 10 years so fortunately they are very rare.

This saturday Kim had booked tickets for 'The wolf man' at the open air cinema.



Every year in January and February Sydney hosts a number of events such as operas, concerts and cinemas.

The open Air cinema is located at Ms Macquaries Chair in the botanical garden overlooking the city, the opera house and the bridge.





It is a spectacular setting, especially when the weather is really nice as it was saturday (last year it was pouring down with rain). This years all the seats were sold out within 30 minutes, but Kim was quick to get a couple (smart cookie).

Even though we got there two hours early most of the seats had already been taken. We did manage to find two seats that were really good eventually (we were worried that we'd have to sit on one of the first rows right in front of the screen.




The movie was about warewolves and it was funny to listen to people reaction when large fruit bats from the botanical garden flew down in front of the set.

This weekend we went for an extended (4 nights) weekend to Hamilton Island with Kims Family.




Hamilton Island is located 1500 kilometers north of Sydney (2.5 hours flight) in the Whitsundays group of islands near the great barrier reef.

This time of the year it is rain season up there and the first three days it was raining a fair bit. This didn't stop us from spending time in the pool or at the beach though. In the evenings we would spend time in the cocktail bars, dining our or playing blackjack.



On the first and the last morning morning we did some catemaran sailing. The wind was a bit patchy with periods with no wind and other with lots of wind.The last day however was beautiful and I gave Kim a very basic first course in sailing after which she took over the steering.




Click here to see a video from the catemaran


One of the other days there was too much wind for them to allow the catemarans going out. I managed to convince the people at the beach to let me take out one of the windsurfers. It was a pretty short session as I found that I am totally out of shape but as least Chong managed to have a bit of a go as well.



Click here to see a video from the windsurfing


We booked an afternoon of snorkeling up near Hayman island. It was a day with pretty rough seas and even though it was a pretty big boat it was really thrown around and a lot of people on the boat got sea sick (Dylan got a bit sick, but otherwise everyone else in the family was ok). After about an hour of sailing the captain said that the seas were too rough and that the water was too murky and dangerous to continue, so he cancelled the trip and returned to port. A bit of a disappointment, but at least we got a refund and a bit of a sailing trip out of it.




I brought a waterproof pouch for my pocket camera which meant that I could take photos under the water and while sailing. This resulted in some pretty good photos in the pool.



The kids (Kims nephews and niece) recently started swimming lessons. They are still a little uncomfortable with the water although this did improve while we were at Hamilton. Especially Ethan is not very comfortable as you can tell from this video:

Video of Ethan swimming


We also took some nice photos of some of the local wildlife and flora on the island and in the dining places.

We (Kim that is) are now almost half way through the pregnancy.

Last week we went to another ultrasound scan to check if everything is on track and to count the number of fingers and toes. Both baby and mum is fine so far. And how is daddy you ask? He is worried how he is going to handle being a dad...such a big responsibility and worried that he will be a lousy dad.




We now also know the sex of the baby...and it is going to be a BOY and is still due in mid-June!!! He has already started kicking according to Kim, so he may be an active one.


We were hoping for a girl because there is already more than enough boys in the family (Kayla started crying when she heard that is was a boy...she was hoping for someone to play with).



Anyway we can now start looking a good names for a boy.I suggested to Kim that we would start an auction on eBay where the winner would get the naming rights...Kim said NOOOO!!! So there goes my retirement plans and all the millions!


For anyone who is planning ahead and start buying stuff for the boy...check with Kim or myself first with regards to what we need (Sizes, Colours and brands).


Rules for toys:


1) No dolls or pink fluffy stuff....it is a boy for christ sake!
2) Climbing harness and shoes are perfect around year 4
3) A pair of skis at age 6
4) First Ice axe and crampons at age 10
5) Toys that required assembling and dis-assembling by the kid is perfect
6) Toys that can be assembled in more than one way is perfect (ie. Lego)
7) Toys that are created with the intension of making noise are banned
8) And the most important: Don't buy a toy unless you can explain to me what valuable lesson you hope the kid will learn from using that toy.

It is common for Australian households to get a number of critters (mainly insects) into their houses during the summertime.

This may range from anything as harmless as flies to more serious things such as spiders. The worst of the spiders is probably the Funnel Webs although they are quite rare and I've never seen one inside.

The more scary but relatively harmless ones are the Huntsman spiders. These can get huge (the size of a dinner plate) and they are quite common inside. We get them inside probably 2-3 times a year and they always scare the #$@#$@ out of us!

The one picture below was inside the shower cabin and scared Kim.



We also get smaller spiders inside...one of these is the Whitetail. It is a smaller spider but they can give a nasty bite that can get infected (but it is very rare for anyone to get bitten). I notice a lot of them outside when I'm watering the grass. I still haven't decided whether it is a problem I need to deal with as they also help controlling other insects.

We also get a lot of lot of other critter such as grasshoppers and caterpillars in the garden. Most of the insects I don't mind...the more biodiversity the more indication of a healthy micro ecosystem...if I could just get rid of the mosquitoes and the fruit flies.

Kim gave me tickets for a performance called Bale de Rua (Brasilian street dance). This satisfied the criteria of experiences rather than objects as presents.




The performance took place in the opera house and it was really good. There was some really cool tricks.

I am still wondering why the dance crew consisted of 15 men and one woman...the woman didn't do anything that required her being a woman so it was a bit odd and could just as well have been a performance consisting of 16 men.

Kim had bought really good seats on the 4th row (almost too close) so we could see every drop of sweat.

While my dad was here we were looking after Kims nephews and niece a fair bit.

They loved coming over here to talk to my dad and play.

When they are here we put them to good use:

Here's is Kayla baking scones for us



And here she is sweeping the floor.



And here she is haging up the laundry.



Unfortunately I didn't get a photo from yesterday when she was watering the lawn for me.

As tradition dictates we played golf with Sasha on new years day. And he had booked a time at Brighton Golf Club (Moorebank) at a civilised hour (1.30pm).

Kim and I hadn't played for about 10 months as we had been too busy with all the other things in 2008 (see the rest of the blog postings).



I think we played a fairly decent game considering the time since we'd last played but both Kim and I were fairly tired after the 18 holes. It was a hot day with temperatures in the mid thirties and the course was fairly hot...so we drank lots of water as we went.

Every year both Kim and I have been in the Sydney harbour area to watch the fireworks on New Years Eve.



But this year we decided to have a quiet new years eve just the two of us with a visit to the movies and then a nice dinner at home.



We did however watch the fireworks from our balcony at midnight and it looked just as spectacular as previous years (I borrowed the photo above from another site).

Between Christmas and New year we drove with Kims family up to Smiths Lake (300km North of Sydney). We rented a house on the lake up there.

We hired a tinny (small aluminium boat) a couple of days and went fishing and managed to catch a lot of breams (a lot too small to keep).





Kims dad loves fishing and he quickly found out that in the morning and evening the fish were at the shore just outside the house.

In the evening we cooked nice dinners and BBQ's and the cookaburras came to the balcony around dinner time to check if there were leftovers. We had a bit of fun with them as you can see.



In the evenings we played Blackjack (Kim and I cleaned up) and had nice food and wine.



Chong (The husband of Kims sister) showed his more feminine side.



The rest of the time we spent at the beach playing in the waves and playing with Kims sisters kids.

Christmas day was celebrated with Kims family at her sisters house.

A lot of people were there and everyone had been asked to bring some food. Kim had cooked Red Duck Curry the day before while I was preparing the Christmas Eve dinner.



Again...lots of food, playing table tennis, jumping the trampoline and all the kids got to open their presents.

Christmas even was celebrated in the traditional Danish way in the evening of the 24th December.

Kim and I had invited some friends over to out new house and prepared the traditional roast duck, ris-a-la-mande and large tiger prawns for entrees.



It was a nice evening and we didn't finish until well after midnight and all of us were really full by the time we finished dinner. There was a couple of kid and after dinner they got to open their Christmas presents.

Every year on Kims dads birthday we celebrate with the family. Every couple brings a couple of dishes of food and we all share it.

On our honeymoon in Bali I really wanted to do this scuba dive that was recommended to me by my friend Andy. It is this old wreck of a US cargo ship (USS liberty) that was torpedoed by the japanese in 1942 and then beached to save the men and the cargo.



The wreck has since slided back into deeper water (during a volcanic eruption in 1962) and it now in 5 to 27 meters of water just off the coast.



I did two dives on the wreck while Kim was snorkeling in the surface on top of the wreck and it is without a doubt the most amazing scuba diving experience I've had. The ship is huge and you can swim through the cargo hulls and there is an amazing variety of fish and corals on the wreck.

I saw a 1.5 meter barracuda, a 1cm tall seahorse, a garden of eels and a great variety of other fish including a large school of travelly.



I had my personal dive master for the day and I got him to take some photos and some video with his camera while we were diving. On the first dive we went all the way around the wreck (max depth 27 meters) and on the second we went through the wreck itself.



Kim had a really good experience as well and really enjoyed the 30 degree warm water and managed to get her bum burnt while snorkeling for several hours.

I think we'll both go back there if we get the chance.

Click here to download video of me feeding fish

Click here to download video of me diving

Our Honeymoon day after the wedding went to Bali in Indonesia. We did have some hesitation going there considering that the Bali Bombers had been executed the week before and that the Australian government discouraged all travel there.

The plane up there (and back) was only 25% full so plenty of space to get a good sleep.

We stayed in Nusa Dua Westin....a nice hotel although the rooms are a bit small.

On the first day we slept in and later in the day drove to Kuta to have a look around and do some shopping. Later in the evening we went to Jimbaran Bay for dinner. This is a whole beach where all the restaurants have put their tables and chairs out onto the beach itself...very romantic but quite expensive compared to local restaurants.





The second day we hired a car to drive us to Ubud in the hills, Monkey Forest and later in the day down to a small place called Tanah Lot. Especially the last one was very nice around sunset and we ended up not getting back to our hotel until 8.30 in the evening much to the dismay of our driver.





Dinner took place near the hotel and we found that the value of the food/prices was much better here.

A couple of days later we went for another drive (In between we went to Tulamben...see posting below) up to some beautiful lakes and temples up on the north of the island as well as rice paddies and we had a really nice trip despite driving with the most grumpy driver.







Time was running out and Kim felt that she hadn't spent enough time shopping so the last two days were spent shopping and sitting at the pool and on the beach.



One evening we booked a really nice restaurant called "The Living Room" in Seminyak and I booked the whole outdoor area (cost a fortune) just so that we could have a romantic evening in the garden just the two of us with personal waiting staff.





The week was way too short and we never got to do everything we wanted to do so I have a feel we will be coming back in the future.

On Sunday the 16th November 2008 I got married to Kim. It was a fantastic day and thanks to family and friends joining us making this a very memorable day.


My day started out (Kims started much earlier) in the morning with my Best Man (Andy) as well as a number of other friends coming over to my house picking up trays, organising ribbons on cars and picking up supplies for the wedding ceremony.

Kim had earlier in the morning left the house to go to her dads place to get dressed and have hair and makeup done.

Once we got the call saying that she was ready we drove over to her dads place and on the way there we were stopped by the police who insisted on breath testing us...sorry guys you were out too early, we hadn't started drinking yet.

At Kims place I had to bribe my way in through the door before they would let me in...all part of the tradition.



Once I was let in my friends carried the trays of fruit, wine and noodles upstairs and this was the first time I saw Kim looking absolutely gorgeous in her wedding dress.
We then started the Tea Ceremony where we first had to pay respect to the elders by burning incense and then serve tea to the parents. In return they would then present us with red envelopes containing money and Kim's dad also gave Kim an old bracelet and ring that used to belong to her mum.



After the Tea ceremony I drove down to La Perouse where the wedding ceremony was going to take place. We were a bit early so they were still getting ready. The wind was really strong so the garden arch needed wires to stay in place etc.

Once all the guests has arrived (around 40-50) Kim arrived in Nancys car with her bridesmaid (Natalie) and the ceremony could begin.



Kim and I had decided and written most of the ceremony ourselves and the celebrant presented it beautifully (and very loud).



After the ceremony we had some drinks and snacks with out guests and then took pictures for the next couple of hours around La Perouse and Centenial Park.

















Later in the afternoon we went back to our house to relax and freshen up for an hour until we then went to the Reception.



We had invited 80 guests and they all arrived (more or less). People were greated out the front where they were served canabes and drinks and there was a pianist playing a piano.

People were then seated and once everyone were at the tables the bridal party was introduced.









After the entrees My dad and Andy held their speeches (both very good and unfortunately mostly true) and after the main courses it was the turn of KC and myself.

To everyones surprise we had arranged entertainment during the evening in the form of some drummers. Everyone was given a drum and had to participate in the drumming.



This also involved us dancing as part of the entertainment.

This was eventually followed by us cutting the wedding cake (a tower of cupcakes) a then dance the bridal walz.






Kim had changed to a more practical dress for the bridal walz and she looked absolutely stunning in it. Because I'd been sunburnt during the day my face almost matched the dress.

End of October we moved settled and moved into the new house. Not without a bit of of drama as the previous owner wasn't out of the house at settlement...but by the end of the day she was fortunately gone.

She was living there with three little boys (terrorists), so there was a number of smaller things that had been neglected and really needed some attention and there were a number of flaws around the place that needed fixing (it seems that the solution to every problem for the previous owners was silicone glue).

Most of this is under control now thanks to my dad helping out while here for the wedding (see next posting). Both Kim and I have now moved all our things and I've put kim in charge of selecting what colours she would like the walls to be downstairs before we go out and buy furniture.

We also need to get new lights downstairs as the ones there heat up and switch themselves off (cheap crap) so I may just as well do the ceiling now that I am at it.

This post is mostly about Claus when he was at his top as one of Denmarks top tennis players.

I have kept scans of all the newspaper clippings from when he was winning a lot of tournaments.





























































In the mid 90's he started to get pretty sick and although he still tried to play tennis it was never at the same level again. Eventually he more or less gave up. His illness took to great a hold of him. These are some of the 'darkest' photos I have of him while he was struggling with his schizophrenia and were taken shortly before I moved to Australia.





He lost contact with most of his friends and was very dependent on my mum and dad as well as other support programs in place.







I prefer to remember him as he was before he passed away.


















This poem reminds me of him.

The morning after I killed myself, I woke up.

I made myself breakfast in bed. I added salt and pepper to my eggs and used my toast for a cheese and bacon sandwich. I squeezed a grapefruit into a juice glass. I scraped the ashes from the frying pan and rinsed the butter off the counter. I washed the dishes and folded the towels.
The morning after I killed myself, I fell in love. Not with the boy down the street or the middle school principal. Not with the everyday jogger or the grocer who always left the avocados out of the bag. I fell in love with my mother and the way she sat on the floor of my room holding each rock from my collection in her palms until they grew dark with sweat. I fell in love with my father down at the river as he placed my note into a bottle and sent it into the current. With my brother who once believed in unicorns but who now sat in his desk at school trying desperately to believe I still existed.

The morning after I killed myself, I walked the dog. I watched the way her tail twitched when a bird flew by or how her pace quickened at the sight of a cat. I saw the empty space in her eyes when she reached a stick and turned around to greet me so we could play catch but saw nothing but sky in my place. I stood by as strangers stroked her muzzle and she wilted beneath their touch like she did once for mine.

The morning after I killed myself, I went back to the neighbors’ yard where I left my footprints in concrete as a two year old and examined how they were already fading. I picked a few daylilies and pulled a few weeds and watched the elderly woman through her window as she read the paper with the news of my death. I saw her husband spit tobacco into the kitchen sink and bring her her daily medication.

The morning after I killed myself, I watched the sun come up. Each orange tree opened like a hand and the kid down the street pointed out a single red cloud to his mother.

The morning after I killed myself, I went back to that body in the morgue and tried to talk some sense into her. I told her about the avocados and the stepping stones, the river and her parents. I told her about the sunsets and the dog and the beach.

The morning after I killed myself, I tried to unkill myself, but couldn’t finish what I started.

—Meggie Royer

Here are some more photos from my childhood in no particular order.

The first ones from a New Years eve where we got a bit silly with the hats. These were taken at a New Years even in Kenya and before my brother got really sick, so probably around 1989/90.



And here is Claus.



And my mum.




I was really good at shooting when I was a kid and won lots of championships. This photo is one of the few things I have from that time.


This is Claus and I with our dog.



Not sure which ones of these is Claus and which is me.




















This was taken just christmas day in the back yard of my grandma's (Mormor) house. We got the skis as a christmas present. All the fields behind her house belonged to my mothers brother Flemming.



I think this may be my brother. For the first time I've noticed the photo in the background. It looks like this may be a photo of my mum with her two sisters and brother and what could be her dad Raimer in the middle.















This would most likely be the new years eve where we were trapped by the snow 1978/79. We were supposed to have celebrated with the family but couldn't even get out of the house. Delicious with a glass of milk and a pie.






We didn't have a lawn in the back yard. Instead we had pebbles...lots of fun shoveling them.







This I think is a christmas eve dinner at my grandmas (mormor) place. My mum on the left and my uncle Flemming in the middle. Not sure who the person standing up in. It could be my grandmas brother. Possibly from around 1976/77


I think it is my great grandpa (Raimer) in the middle row number two from the left. The title of the photo says that it is Christoffer (??) in the top left corner. Looking at the age of the boys this would have been taken in the 1920's.


Claus dancing aeound the christmas tree and my mum and grandma (Bedstemor/Farmor).


From left to Right. My grandma (On my dads side/Bedstemor/farmor), Knud Aage (My uncle/dads brother), My mum (in the foreground), My grandad (in the background), Irene (my auntie/dads sister), Grete and I assume the baby is Vinnie which means that it is likely that my mum was pregnant with Claus (born in July).






















This was taken at my grandparents place and after my brother got sick. He was really suffering at this point.






This is one of the happiest family photos I have and the only one I have a print of.



Going for a walk at Marielyst with Lott and Willy some of our german friends. Claus in the foreground and my dad on the right. I think you can just spot me in yellow pants in the background.



I think this is at Lotte and Willy's summer house.






Not sure if this is Claus or myself being babtised. It is my grand mother being god mother.











This was taken outside our summer house in Marielyst.



My brother number 2 from the top right on his school photo.



Claus at daycare number 4 from the top left.



Me at day care top left.

Here is some more old photos of my mum. This time with here brother and sisters.

This first one if probably one of the oldest. You can tell that the photo was shot in black and white and that the negative was later coloured (badly). It would be my mum in the middle with her two sisters Eli (the oldest on the right) and Yrsa.




This is my mum in the middle with what I assume is cousins.





I think it is my grandmother (Karen) holding my mum.


Here is the same as the first photo, but this time without the colour.



My mum and her sisters playing in the courtyard of their farm


My mum with her older sisters.


Eli, Yrsa, Sonja and Flemming Kragh.


Having her photo taken as a little girl.


Upset about having her photo taken?
























My mum with her younger brother Flemming.


As a liitle girl


My mum in school.





From left to right...Eli, Yrsa my mum (Sonja) and Flemming.


As a young girls/woman...possibly from her Konfirmation.



My mum as a girl scout (no 4 from the left).


It is Flemming in the middle and my mum on the right.

This weekend we took the kids for a walk with some friends from Maroubra to Lurline Bay.

It is a nice little pleasant walk that is easy for the kids.




They loved jumping between the boulders.




...and exploring the small rock pools.







Because of the recent storms the beach was full of Blue bottles, so no playing in the sand this time around.





They are nasty little creatures that will sting you badly if you touch them.




This surfer was being very careful in his bare feet.

Earlier this month it was Lucas birthday.

We didn't have a kids party for him, but we did celebrate with the family.







We gave him a new bike for his birthday...he was stunned and didn't know what to think of it, but he loves riding it now.

When I was a kid we would every summer travel to Southern Europe with our caravan.

Usually travelling through Swizerland or Austria ending up in Italy (Either Lido di Jesolo or the Italian Riviera). Underway we would visit old friends of my mum and dad from the time they were working in Italy.

Here are some photos from that time.









I just noticed the burn scar on my arm on the above photo. I think this is one of the few childhood photos where you can really see it.




















This was out caravan while travelling.








This is our caravan with the tent up in the middle.

Last weekend there was a Lego exhibition in the city.

We caught the train in to St James station and walked from there.





It was a fairly small exhibition with my favourite being the pirate ship with all the details of the lower decks.












There was also some Ninjago and Star wars.










And a lot of other pieces.

This Sunday it was fathers day.

It was celebrated with a game of Bowling with the kids in the morning and then family dinner in the evening (with yummi chocolate cake).







This photo is the only family photo I have with the entire Kims family (including little Mia).

Rather than keeping all the kids artwork I instead take photos of it.

Here is some of the latest additions.

This weekend Kim and I joined a couple of friends at the opera house to see the show Anything Goes.

This is a great musical which I believe is based on a book and it was first shown on Broadway all the way back in 1934.

I love the old costumes from back...

It is summer and Lucas and Aiden is enjoying a bit of water play in the back yard on warm days.

This Sunday we had Aiden and Lucas baptised in the local church in Maroubra. Lucky that both Aiden and Lucas behaved throughout the 2 hour long service.

The rocks at Malua Bay were quite spectacular and dramatic. A couple of times I ventured down to try my luck with some photos around sunset (grey every day)...I really suck at this style and constantly got my tripod soaked.

These were the two best results.

Having the beach so close was great. I went for a run every morning before breakfast.



We also had a lot of fun playing at the beach with the kids.















And everyone was just really enjoying the time there.

On news years day we had a very nice dinner at an Indian restaurant (I was soooo full afterwards).

The restaurant also had lice indian music as entertainment.

On New Years eve there was a fair on and we let the kids have a couple of rides.






They also had a visit to one of the fire engines.



I actually did a ride as well, which is the most awesome one I have seen in years...but because of the scare factor it is censored from this site.

Chong brought his little tinny along and him and Kims dad went fishing every second day.

I went along one morning out in the open water.



I caught a small flathead (and a puffer fish) which was too small to keep.

At the beach not far from the house there was a playground. It was great to let the kids play together.

Aiden was obviously keen on going on the swing.






But also the other kids had a go.

Over the new year we went with the family to Malua Bay Beach down south.

The house was beach front with great access directly to the beach.







The big wrap-around balcony was great for the kids to play on and they spent hours running around.





And it was great for the family to be together.





There were also lots of chicadas and Ethan found a dead one.

Aiden got a new bike and helmet for Christmas. He was very proud as it was the biggest present under the tree.



The helmet is a combined bicycle and climbing helmet (cost more than the bike) so will see if I can also find an opportunity to take him climbing in the new year.

I went a trip to Calgary (as well as to Seattle) in the end of 2005. It was lots of meetings and in Calgary we were invited to provide input to our workflow product from the field.

While we were there they had the Chinook, which is a warm wind that appear during the winters...so during the day it was really pleasant.

One night we went to see a game of ice hockey against the Calgary Flames and Chicago...it was the only game that Calgary lost that season.


Click here to see more photos from: Calgary 2005/Slideshow

At the end of 2005 my Mum and Dad escaped the winter in Denmark by travelling to Sydney for a couple of weeks.

They stayed here over Christmas and New Years Eve. While they were here we went for a drive up to Graemes house at Taylors Lake near Port Macquarie where we Christmas Eve cooking traditional danish Roast Duck, and Ris-a-la-mande.

New years even we celebrated at Graemes place at McMahons Point here in Sydney.

New Years day was the hottest on record...48 degrees.

Click here to see more photos from: Christmas and New Years Eve 2005/Slideshow

Kim and I found a couple of hours to play 9 holes of golf on a short (mostly) par 3 course after not playing for 5 years.

It was nice getting out again after that long time even though it was very windy and freezing.

Last weekend we went to Cabramatta to have my car services and also make a bit of a day trip out of it.

Kim had a haircut while the boys has ice cream.



She also went past the show shop where they sell boots in her size.




Aiden got a new Lightning Mcqueen pyjamas that he was very excited about.




Lots of street food about to make you hungry.










So Lunch we had...





All very tiring.

One of the last days when the kids were still a bit sick we though we'd get them out of the house and go to Darling Harbour.

Aiden wanted to go on the tea-cups even though he was still suffering a bit.

A few weeks ago I was in Melbourne for work.

On the way back Kim called and said that Aiden had a really high fever (41+ degrees) and that she was going to get him to the hospital because she was afraid that he'd collapse like he did last time.

I jumped on an earlier flight and went straight to the hospital and spent the night with him. He was really miserable and it took 5 days (fortunately not in the hospital) before we got the fever under control.



After that Lucas got sick and then Kim as well....what a week!!

Here is some photos that I have taken from various places including work.

They don't really belong anywhere but it is a pity to not share them.

One day walking from the train station I walked past this pair of sandals under a tree. I don't know the story behind them or the reason why one was taped up.

Did the owner climb the tree and then vanish? Did he (I assume it was a male) walk away bare feet? Where did he come from (Bata is a big brand in Africa and India)?



This next one was taken on the train. I was bored and notices this girl with a small swallow tattoo.




One day I was at Warriewood for a work meeting a dropped past Narrabeen beach (where I used to live). It was a beautiful day to have a play with the panorama function on the iphone.



Here is another panorama. This time from Town hall in Sydney.

We had our annual conference there and couldn't resist getting some photos of the beautiful architecture with my phone.





A couple of weeks ago I went to Melbourne for work. On the way we flew over the Snowy Mountains and I could see the snow there.




Here is another one from work that I took ages ago. When we all moved to the Campus from the city we were invited to hand our own avatar on this wall (mine is hanging somewhere in the top left hand corner).




Here is a photo from the campus itself. It is a cool place to work. Just a pity it is so far from the city.

It is not often that I see Aiden engaged in painting at daycare (he used to be reluctant to get dirty, but now he loves it).

Here he is working on one of his masterpieces.

Lucas loves reading books...he can sit and look at books for hours if he is allowed.

One day at daycare all the other kids were playing loudly in another room and I found him in a separate room sitting quietly sitting in a small cardboard box reading by himself.

The kids are really excited whenever they get something with Thomas (the tank engine) on it.

Latest is Aiden's new Bath rope. He was so excited that he asked me to take a photo.

Yesterday we decided to do a little excursion to Circular Quay and the Opera house with the boys.

The both love trains, so we took the train into the city so that they could have the experience.



It was a cold and windy winters day here in Sydney so standing still for too long was freezing.



But it was great getting out and also get another family photo.

It was Kim's birthday on the weekend.

In the morning the boys and I woke her up with singing Happy Birthday to her.

In the evening we had a babysitter so that we could have an evening just the two of us. We went to the Bridge Room restaurant in the city, food was nice!